More of the same
I so dislike how my perspective changes. Yesterday, I felt like I could since a future and looked forward to doing some of the things I used to enjoy. Today, I am dragging myself through the first part of my day, feeling everyday will be the same, longing for bedtime.
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Grief has taught me many things and one of them is you cant change the past, you cant predict the future so just live in the moment. Also cling to hope with everything you got because grief tries to take it away from you. Sending you a big hug as you work your way through this brutal journey.
Thanks Gerald, the surprises of this horrific journey amaze and confuse me. Some days I think I used all my strength fighting the cancer battle along side my husband and that energy is finite and other days I seem able to half a dream that brings me hope.
I did realize today that a feeling I was holding onto was a means to not be vulnerable to others. With that insight I can see ways to let go of that hurt.