Mixed Emotions

Thank you all for the encouragement in my healing.  I hope you all are doing well too.  I am slowly making progress one day at a time.  At least once or twice a week I go with no lights on inside my apartment at night to test my fear of the dark.  Well, I have not had much problem ever since the first night I begun it.  Every now and then I will have a night light on, it just depends.  I think I am about ready to test my bounds by seeing if I can sleep in my own room, but I can't seem to get myself in there because it brings back memories from the rape because his room is directly above mine.  See what I mean???  Any thoughts on getting myself to sleep in my own bed?  I did break down and cry a little today because what he did to me almost 7 months ago hurt me a lot.  I hate the guy, but do long for him to see Jesus.  I have a gut feeling, but not sure on it, that he may be going back to church due to what he has been doing on Saturday's.  I hope so.  I sure am praying, or at least trying to. I officially do graduate from Manhattan Christian College this July.  I am so excited!!!!  I have enrolled in my last set of classes, and am striving hard to pay them off before the semester begins. Oh, I get to go to a Leadership Simulcast this Friday at my church, and I get to use it for work as CEU's.  I am so excited, and the speakers are renowned and phenomenal.  I am glad to build upon what I have learned from MCC to attend this event. Have a great week!

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

you are doing a great job at facing your fears and overcoming them......i pray that God will bless you more with His perfect love......hugs to you!
deleted_user
deleted_user

I heard about that simulcast on Friday. Good for you. I hope you gain some invaluable knowledge from it.

CONGRATULATIONS on your near completion of college. God bless you. You\'re doing quite well, young lady. Keep up the good work. You have my prayers.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Praise God for your great report and blessing in graduating towards the goal!

God will help you heal through that time in your life that is difficult. I know from personal experience-to depend on Him for your inner strength and He will remove the pain from your memories. Apply some of your skills from college and just continue to trust in the Lord.

I have sleep problems and what I find to help me is take a shower first, pray and read the Bible or book to relax. When I wake up-pray again for peace and try it again.

Hope this helps
deleted_user
deleted_user

Awesome!!!! Glad your feeling better! Let us now when u graduate.