milestone/whatever

July 14th, 2 days past what would have been an marriage anniversary of 18yrs.
 
    Computer world,  to do anything today, you must be fluent in PC signals, sign ins and jargon.   Each day where I work, in order to complete on-line reports I must sign in,   simple enough,    my employee#, (by the way thats all I am is a number)  then a password.   I have requested to change this password 4 times in the past 4 years, to no avail.
  I am requested to change passwords every 6 months, for every other program at this facility.  Yet I am not allowed to change this one.  Each time I change a password, it has to be a STRONG, password.   Also has to be different from any password used in the past 18months.  Well with age, my memory, among other things, is not what it once was.   I now carry a small pocket notebook just to keep up with our ever changing internet world.
  at one point I had 63 log-ins,  cut that to 38 today,  dropped a good deal of the accounts I was privy to,  and told 3 dating sites to take a hike,  * completely a waste of my time and energy, not to mention the fact that the type of ladies/trolls I am getting responses from, in my mind, is degrading.*
   july12,  that date should have been symbolic for an eternity, now its a password, one that reminds me on a semi daily basis, that once again I failed.
 
   Difficult at best when each day at work, I am reminded of what once was, what will not be, and what can never change,  all with 6 key strokes.
   Why will they not allow a change? Have I made a change?  Yes,  my life is forever changed, the lives of my children, my family, all are experiencing this change.
 
   I pray it is for the better.
 
   Did not wish her a smug almost happy anniversary,  have not spoke to her in a while.  Did not cry on the 12th,   milestone for me, "whatever" for all that see.
 
  dear company,  let me change  the password,  I think it might help us all.