Mental
It was one year ago today that I was hoping to go home from the state mental hospital. The police had knocked on my door the morning before thanks to a friend. I had planned on committing suicide and made the "mistake?" of emailing him to say good-bye. I hadn't even contacted my sisters. When Bill, my friend, couldn't get me on the phone, he called the police. They "suggested" I come with them to the local mental health center. I was out of money, had no job, and no prospects. They told me they wanted me to be evaluated and it wouldn't take long. The people at the center said I would probably spend the night at the center and, depending on the outcome, go home the next day. That all changed during the day and it was decided I would go to hospital about 2 hours away. I was allowed to make only one call, so I called my cousin to have her take care of Foxy. She called my sisters, but no one would verify for them was even in the system. Finally, my older sister in California got through and I told her what was going on. She called my younger sister who lived an hour and a half from me. After going through a series of tests at the hospital, they allowed me to go home. They drove me to the bus station and my cousin was there to take me home. When I got home, I found a deposit slip for my bank account where my younger sister written out a check. My older sister would send me one too. It would have been very easy to stay in the hospital. It was fun watching the "crazy" people in my residence and the food was good. I wouldn't have to worry about anything and Foxy would have gotten a better home. I, sometimes, still wonder if I made the right decision coming home. Things have worked out for the better for the most part, although my body seems to be breaking down more and its hard to deal with it. It might have gotten boring after a while, but not to have any worries seemed pretty good at the time.
Replies
Precious Mike - I can so well relate to those feelings. To come here and share what we are attempting to survive to find a quality life to live once again means everything to me. Coping alone after the death of my husband where I have been left severely disabled without family to care and where the \'Christian community\' I had considered to be my family, literally, in every respect of the word issued to me a process of death without mercy for me to attempt and survive. I had to face reality fully and realize I had been handed a \'stone\' for the starvation I was attempting to survive with unmet needs alone and ill while also being unloved and uncared for. Accepting reality has helped more than anything else at improving life over time. I\'m today very realistic and live a practical life and this allows for moments of joy and happiness from simplifying everything and making life \'doable\'.
Gentle ((hugs)) shared and keep venting and sharing the challenges you are working at surviving as it does bring a special healing over time that allows for a better quality life to be lived.
:-) Patricia
Good they let you go-I was committed to a 72 hour hold
and was in for 9 days
Glad you got to come home and sorry for what you went through
I did not have fun watching crazy people and the food was not good. Well the morning Rice krispies were good
It may have been good or not-hard to say
I will say though that my stay saved my life...
HUGS
WELL....hard to say whether it would have been good for you or not
Hope you are doing all right now
It depends on each person, and it is different in each hospital-mental health center
HUGS for you
Hope you feel better and better each day. This is such a wonderful place to heal. Good luck to you!