Meeting at the school

I am frustrated. My daughter has been picked on for most of the school year by a group of boys. I think that the boys like her - she is cute, smart, athletic, interesting (although a tad verbose), and definately not shy, 9 year old girl. I suspect that the boys that she keeps getting into trouble with actually like her, but in the way of 10 year old boys, pick on her to get her attention. They have her attention. There are several boys who she mentions to me frequently, one that she mentions several times each day, over and over, who I'm convinced she is going to marry one day, because the two of them are constantly at each other and cannot seem to let it go at all. Another had (we moved it) the locker next to hers, and they had words on several occasions.  Unfortunately, my daughter , when pushed, pushes back instead of telling the teacher. She threatened the other kid, telling him that she strangles anyone whose name begins with "Ty", and that he was "dead, no matter where you go". She got herself suspended.  I had to go for one of those meetings at the school, and they are, as you would expect them to be, seriously concerned about the threats. They have asked me to check her backpack for knives (as if she would actually do that) and are watching her for every minute of the day to make sure that she doesn't hurt anyone. This girl has a strong will, a quick temper, and a vivid imagination. She is also extremely angry, and had a very hard time adjusting to life here, not only with me, but moving from Warwick, RI to Rural Maine was also traumatic.  She has nightmares and is terrified to sleep alone. She imagines all kinds of things happening, like this onetime when she was sure that a sumo ressler was going to break into the house and shoot one of us.  Being from Rhode Island, it is ingraned that you don't tell on people. It is part of the culture in Rhode Island that you mind your own business and take whatever is dished out or fight back. It's hard for her to understand that in Maine she is supposed to tell the teacher when someone is picking on her, and the pressure built to such a degree that she could not control her temper. I had her in counseling, but the counselor didn't work out. At first, I thought that it was helping, but after several months the counselor started telling me that she didn't think she could help her much and wanted me to enroll her in the intensive program. No other option was offerred, but thi intensive program, which was not an acceptable option.  So, tomorrow morning, I am bringing her for a re-evaluation with another counselor. I am hoping that this one will give me a better understanding of my daughter's alleged condition and help smooth things over at the school. I think that this is a normal 9 year old girl who has a bad temper and has been traumatized too often. She is learning how to control her temper and adjusting to her environment, however, the school was told that she had a reactive attachment disorder, which is highly unlikely, and we all need to know what we are truely dealing with here. I'm having trouble getting rid of the anger I feel towards the former counselor, who recommended things to the school which I feel strongly are inappropriate and detremental to her adjustment to her new home. She's been with me for over a year now, and our home is a calm, peaceful environment, for the most part, and everyone that deals with the girl has commented on the progress she's made over the last year.  I wish I could be more confident about this, but after all the girl has been through, having been in foster care for 3 years and being permanently separated from her mother, I don't want the type of disruption to the peace of our home to destroy it all. I am worried.