Maybe Wednesday

Cycle monitoring has been interesting. I keep expecting the rug to slip from underneath me. I have one follicle that is 1.97 however my lining is still a little thing at 5.6. They are going to give it one more day and hope that Wednesday will be the insemination day. Part of me wants to be excited, the other part is afraid.I have not told anyone this time, because I do not want to explain it over and over again. My parents have no idea. As my brothers death anniversary approaches, my parents are expecting my Dh and I to do more stuff...you know attend the masses, go to the cemetary, just hang out with them. I really can not tell them that we are going through another IUI in case it doesn't work. Being with them has been making me more sad about missing Duane. At the moment I can not take the depression or the saddness for fear that it will adversely effect the IUI.I guess what happens happens...I have no control over it.