Maybe its just Winter Blues
I got interrupted journalling yesterday so just wanted to flesh it out. Lots of things not right suddenly. My friend Nicky has cancer and the chemo didn't zap it too well. I haven't heard from her since i last contacted her-and don't know what to say anyway. Another friend has just had a brush with cancer too, though he sounds more likely to sail through it OK.
I wrote to my bro for his birthday and haven't heard back. I woke this morning with a bad headache which sent me to the bathroom being sick. A day off work is a good thing as I am probably very tired. I stayed in bed till lunchtime and am now up in my dressing gown with Arnie in front of the gas heater while Ivan takes the car to get a warrant. Arnie can't settle down if Ivan is away. On full alert.
My weight is back to 68kilos /150 lbs, and my shoulder is still sore after 6 months. What else can I moan about?
Chat isn't coming back any time soon I bet. Miss it heaps.
Winter is here and very drear. I feel a lot less motivated recently. I know that to tackle a task, even if you don't feel like it, is the best way to get cracking-but I can't be bothered translating that knowing into action. I need to go through all my notes from meetings with my Peer Support Worker friend Lisa, and pick out all we have achieved together. I made a start a week or so ago, but suddenly can't be bothered. She has been supporting me since I finished seeing the psychiatric services almost a year ago, but that free support will finish at the end of August. I still don't really know if I'm bipolar or just got depressed cos life got too hard or what?
I have done some pretty off the wall things over the years-but I used to always combine a manic with booze, so didnt know what was really going on....
But those depressions were something else and couldn't be denied, weren't just a bad hair day. I am frightened they may come back. I have to keep enjoying the little things.
So grateful for Ivan in my life. He makes me laugh and informs me and I love that! I just hope he is OK, and I wish i could help him in any way. Do you think he would ask me to?
We are going to the Nutcracker on Ice soon-that will be a great night out! I'm also meeting up with old school friend at end of the month and that will be good too. Here comes Ivan back, and that is specially good!
I wrote to my bro for his birthday and haven't heard back. I woke this morning with a bad headache which sent me to the bathroom being sick. A day off work is a good thing as I am probably very tired. I stayed in bed till lunchtime and am now up in my dressing gown with Arnie in front of the gas heater while Ivan takes the car to get a warrant. Arnie can't settle down if Ivan is away. On full alert.
My weight is back to 68kilos /150 lbs, and my shoulder is still sore after 6 months. What else can I moan about?
Chat isn't coming back any time soon I bet. Miss it heaps.
Winter is here and very drear. I feel a lot less motivated recently. I know that to tackle a task, even if you don't feel like it, is the best way to get cracking-but I can't be bothered translating that knowing into action. I need to go through all my notes from meetings with my Peer Support Worker friend Lisa, and pick out all we have achieved together. I made a start a week or so ago, but suddenly can't be bothered. She has been supporting me since I finished seeing the psychiatric services almost a year ago, but that free support will finish at the end of August. I still don't really know if I'm bipolar or just got depressed cos life got too hard or what?
I have done some pretty off the wall things over the years-but I used to always combine a manic with booze, so didnt know what was really going on....
But those depressions were something else and couldn't be denied, weren't just a bad hair day. I am frightened they may come back. I have to keep enjoying the little things.
So grateful for Ivan in my life. He makes me laugh and informs me and I love that! I just hope he is OK, and I wish i could help him in any way. Do you think he would ask me to?
We are going to the Nutcracker on Ice soon-that will be a great night out! I'm also meeting up with old school friend at end of the month and that will be good too. Here comes Ivan back, and that is specially good!
Replies
Hi Dinah! :) my family and i are sending our very best positive healing energy, and well wishes, hoping, and praying that you feel much better, and wishing your friends full comfort, healing, and peace. i understand, i have some friends who are battling cancer too. i worry about them, especially when i don\'t hear from them in a while. sending lots of healing energy, and our best well wishes, and hoping for the very best of healing. i\'ll always be here for you, our dear friend. :) i am so glad, and thankful you have Ivan, and Arnie in your life :) family, and friends are so special, and precious. :) i\'m happy you are keeping focused on healing, and looking forward to going to the nutcracker on ice soon. :) That will be a nice event, and something to look forward too. :) You\'ve got mail coming your way soon, i\'m writing you a card. :) keep your chin up, and continue to take good care. :) Your friendship is very special to us. :) my family and i send our love, many peaceful healing blessings, warm friendship wishes, caring thoughts, and lots of comforting hugs, from our home to yours :)
Oh a case of severe fuckits I see. I know that feeling well & you have my full sympathy. It goes deeper than fuckits & I can\'t be arsedness. It is a black pit otherwise known as the shit pit & you are in it head first watching all the shit float by. That is a good way to describe depression. Just know that eventually things will get better. I\'m always around if you want a moan or anything. I\'m in a pretty moany mood atm but then I forget what I\'m moaning about haha!