May it end.......

I am sitting here trying to work. But not getting any where. The desk is piled with paper. My life is becoming more and more hectic. And I really don't want it to stop. But in the same aspect, I would love to leave work early and go climb into bed for the rest of the day. Yes you do still want to go hide in the bed!!! But life doesn't let that happen at least my life anyway. I am not doing well today. I am dreading tommorrow. It will be another friday night alone. I have nothen planned. Man I have to find something to do on Fridays but it is so hard. Because of Matt's schedule. It is booked.he has a youth activity a all nighter. I am so happy he is so well rounded and has so much to do. But I feel like my life dictates around him. And I don't have anyone to hang with when he is not around. Does that make sense. I guess I will just crawl up and read a good book. I love people. I always have. So I hate not having them around.  Three months ago I took in a border to help with the bills, and now I want to ask her to leave. She lived here for 3 months we are going on our fourth. She paid the first two months. And now there excuse for everything. As a christian, I feel betrayed, and on the other hand, I feel like a fool.  So I am just going to pray on it. Well, Steve has called in two weeks and I am starting to wander if he walked away because I tried to be more than friends. I don't know. Maybe he has a girlfriend and he just doesn't want me to know. I am feeling Horrible. As the moment ticks I am leaving work. For an hour. Talk to you later.