Marriage Review
(Post #2, since I've been having such a problem posting here lately!)
In reading the message boards, support forums & blogs, several things stand out to me for my consideration: what do I need? what do I want? what can I live with? what I can't live with? what can I give?
I need:
- physical safety
- not taking away/indebting where we are financially
- logistical help with the kids
I want/would like:
- emotional safety
- at least some financial support
- trust
- respect for my personhood
- emotional support
I cannot live with:
- physical abuse
- infidelity
- outright rudeness/disrespect
I can manage to live with:
- not getting my "wants" met (except for respect)
I can give (right now) (dependent on meeting of needs/wants):
- emotional support for his commitments that are not harmful to me
- financial support for needs
- prayer
(Hmm...I'm noticing that all of these are things that are "mine"--I "own" them. None are under his ownership. A good thing, since I can only take responsibility for & control of me. And it looks to me that they may(?) even be boundaries! I think this is a big step for me!)
Anyhow...I think that:
a - getting needs & wants met & being able to give what I can will lead to a good & fulfilling marriage
b - getting needs met, being able to give what I can & not receiving what I cannot live with will lead to a tolerable marriage
c - not getting needs met & receiving what I can't live with will lead to an intolerable & probably no marriage.
Looking this over, I think I am being very realistic with my expectations. Yeah, they seem really low, but this is the reality I'm dealing with. And I feel really good about this moment of clarity.
In reading the message boards, support forums & blogs, several things stand out to me for my consideration: what do I need? what do I want? what can I live with? what I can't live with? what can I give?
I need:
- physical safety
- not taking away/indebting where we are financially
- logistical help with the kids
I want/would like:
- emotional safety
- at least some financial support
- trust
- respect for my personhood
- emotional support
I cannot live with:
- physical abuse
- infidelity
- outright rudeness/disrespect
I can manage to live with:
- not getting my "wants" met (except for respect)
I can give (right now) (dependent on meeting of needs/wants):
- emotional support for his commitments that are not harmful to me
- financial support for needs
- prayer
(Hmm...I'm noticing that all of these are things that are "mine"--I "own" them. None are under his ownership. A good thing, since I can only take responsibility for & control of me. And it looks to me that they may(?) even be boundaries! I think this is a big step for me!)
Anyhow...I think that:
a - getting needs & wants met & being able to give what I can will lead to a good & fulfilling marriage
b - getting needs met, being able to give what I can & not receiving what I cannot live with will lead to a tolerable marriage
c - not getting needs met & receiving what I can't live with will lead to an intolerable & probably no marriage.
Looking this over, I think I am being very realistic with my expectations. Yeah, they seem really low, but this is the reality I'm dealing with. And I feel really good about this moment of clarity.
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