Mama drama continued

So my mother is at it again. In my last entry I was talking about my mother & her demanding nature & how she has said cruel things to me since Eddie's passing. My mother never cared about how her words hurt & its been worse since Ed's passing since I'm not as available to her as I once was. I didn't call her this week at all so she told my brother that I don't care about her or her birthday. My brother was helpful & explained that I was taking a break from her words that have caused me & my grandchildren pain. This made her call me yelling yesterday morning. I told her I cannot have these conversations anymore. I can't stand the drama & I'm too fragile to deal with her hurtful words. She denied saying anything cruel. When I told her some of the things she said to me she denied everything & said I was ruining her birthday, (just happened that all this nonsense coincided with her birthday - it wasn't planned) & that all I ever do is "find fault" with everything she says. I said, "Yes when you tell me to get over it, he's in a better place, what's wrong with you- you had him 37 years, everyone dies and that she felt the best when Eddie (and I quote ) was laid out because her family was around her, yes I cannot tolerate this anymore." She has said more, but the most painful thing was her reference to Eddie being laid out -referring to his wake. She said this to me about 2 weeks after Ed passed. The day of his wake, was the 2nd worst day of my life. The 1st being the actual day he passed. Why anyone would want me to think about that again I just can't imagine.

My mother's needs have always superseded mine & my brother's; even when we were kids. I don't expect that to change, but I just would be satisfied if she would even take some responsibility & stop making this harder for me. I told her I can't do this anymore & said goodbye. She called back & I restated that I am not going to talk anymore. She said I ruined her birthday. I said, "I'm sorry but that has nothing to do with this, goodbye. I'm sticking to my decision. I cannot allow her to cause me additional pain.

So we'll see. If she can be more respectful I don't mind helping her out once in a while. Or I will remove myself totally. Either way is fine with me.
Thanks for listening. I'm calm & doing ok. Church this morning helped.
Love and peace to all. Hugs, Linda