Major Blow Out
Had a major blow out last out, after 7 years I finally broke down. Told my girlfriend I wish she would cheat on me, cause her and the kids would be better off without me (plus other stuff).
Still can't believe I broke down, but now she knows the truth about the pain and how it is really affecting me. I'm very very good at hiding it, its the one thing I can hide to the point where no one knows that I'm even hurting. Think I shocked her when i broke down. But so glad it happened.
Not so bad so far, but yeap their is always a BUT. Its took 7 years but (see another one) its finally beatten me. I feel as if its won, I just cannot take being in pain anymore. I even came up with a plan smash my back higher than where the damage is now and then it will be gone, yes I would be in a wheel chair but the pain would be gone (don't worry doesn't sound good today, more like stupid).
I feel so weak that its beatten me even the slightly but of pain now and i cannot cope with it.
Still can't believe I broke down, but now she knows the truth about the pain and how it is really affecting me. I'm very very good at hiding it, its the one thing I can hide to the point where no one knows that I'm even hurting. Think I shocked her when i broke down. But so glad it happened.
Not so bad so far, but yeap their is always a BUT. Its took 7 years but (see another one) its finally beatten me. I feel as if its won, I just cannot take being in pain anymore. I even came up with a plan smash my back higher than where the damage is now and then it will be gone, yes I would be in a wheel chair but the pain would be gone (don't worry doesn't sound good today, more like stupid).
I feel so weak that its beatten me even the slightly but of pain now and i cannot cope with it.
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