Made up some Sleep
Last night I got a lot of sleep. I woke up around 12:30 after falling asleep after midnight (so that's 12 hours of sleep) and ate a piece and a half of pizza. That upset my stomach and I had a migraine, so I lay back down until 3. I ended up staying in bed until 5pm, when the Excedrin Migraine I had taken had kicked in. I took Tylenol at first, but that didn't do anything, so I took the Excedrin later. I know I took too much Tylenol for the time, but I really needed to get rid of that headache. My stomachache didn't go away until much later. I took some Tums when I got up around 3, and that worked for a little while, but last night and this morning I was in stomach pain from that pizza. I guess when you eat healthy for so long and then try and cheat your body reminds you that you are supposed to be eating healthy. I need to know that for LA, since I'm going to be tempted by so much fast food and yummy treats that it's going to be hard to say no. But the good part is that I can have healthy choices if I know where to look. My stepdad eats pretty healthy since he has diabetes, so there won't be too much bad food at his place unless I buy it myself.
I didn't do much exercise today... I got in my strength training, but I didn't go for a walk. I just felt so crappy between the migraine and the stomach pain that I didn't want to go out, and by the time I felt better it was after dark and I don't go walking after dark. I don't live in the best neighborhood, so it's best if a single woman isn't out alone at night. Geo is over at his dad's house, so even if he could walk with me, he's not home to walk with me. I don't know what time he's going to get home... He's watching football. His team, the Giants, won today, so I know that makes him happy. They are now in the playoffs. He's happy about that. He's over there watching more football, so I don't know what time he's going to be home. I'm glad I didn't go with him considering how bad I felt today. I would have felt like crap over there and created tension between him and his parents. I don't like doing that, so I prefer to stay home. I did almost go with him, though, but I'm glad I didn't.
I got really depressed today about me going to LA. I'm afraid of being away from Geo for so long. He provides so much support for me that I'm scared of going without it for 3 weeks. I don't talk to him much when I'm gone.. I don't know what to say. I talk to him about my day, and then there's nothing else to say. I say I miss him, and then it's just silence until I feel uncomfortable and hang up. Plus, I won't be able to call him until midnight Miami time, and I know he's going to be awake, but it's still late and I would like him to be asleep. I guess this will be a real test of how good I do on my own. It's scary, but I need to learn how to be strong truly on my own. As much as I hate to think of it, I'm not going to have Geo by my side for the rest of my life. He needs to get that surgery or else he's not going to be alive in 10 years. That in itself is depressing. I want him to be by my side till the end. I love him so much.
I'm also scared because last time I was in LA I almost kissed a girl. I forgot about Geo for a split second and me and this girl had that moment, you know, that moment right before you kiss before I snapped out of it and moved on. I'm not going anywhere near that girl this time, and I'm not going near anyone that I might be attracted to. I guess I should be proud that I was tempted and overcame, but it was still scary. Geo knows about the incident, and he's not that happy about it, but he knows I love him and would do anything for him. I would never intentionally hurt him.
Food today was good... I'm back down in my calories to where I want to be to lose weight. Even with eating the pizza for breakfast. I had salad for lunch and regular dinner. I might have some ice cream to put me at 1,300 calories since I'm in the low 1,200's right now. Still, it's better than the 1,900's that I was eating for the past couple of days. It's funny how what normal people eat seem so high to me, but I'm trying to lose weight, not maintain, so it's okay. I just need to make sure that I don't get too used to being so low on calories that when I hit my goal weight I freak out about eating that many calories in a day like I am now.
Oh, and Ann.. my doctor knows how I use my klonopin, for sleep. I've tried other things, and I like klonopin best. I was put on it for anxiety, and now just use it for sleep, so don't worry!
I didn't do much exercise today... I got in my strength training, but I didn't go for a walk. I just felt so crappy between the migraine and the stomach pain that I didn't want to go out, and by the time I felt better it was after dark and I don't go walking after dark. I don't live in the best neighborhood, so it's best if a single woman isn't out alone at night. Geo is over at his dad's house, so even if he could walk with me, he's not home to walk with me. I don't know what time he's going to get home... He's watching football. His team, the Giants, won today, so I know that makes him happy. They are now in the playoffs. He's happy about that. He's over there watching more football, so I don't know what time he's going to be home. I'm glad I didn't go with him considering how bad I felt today. I would have felt like crap over there and created tension between him and his parents. I don't like doing that, so I prefer to stay home. I did almost go with him, though, but I'm glad I didn't.
I got really depressed today about me going to LA. I'm afraid of being away from Geo for so long. He provides so much support for me that I'm scared of going without it for 3 weeks. I don't talk to him much when I'm gone.. I don't know what to say. I talk to him about my day, and then there's nothing else to say. I say I miss him, and then it's just silence until I feel uncomfortable and hang up. Plus, I won't be able to call him until midnight Miami time, and I know he's going to be awake, but it's still late and I would like him to be asleep. I guess this will be a real test of how good I do on my own. It's scary, but I need to learn how to be strong truly on my own. As much as I hate to think of it, I'm not going to have Geo by my side for the rest of my life. He needs to get that surgery or else he's not going to be alive in 10 years. That in itself is depressing. I want him to be by my side till the end. I love him so much.
I'm also scared because last time I was in LA I almost kissed a girl. I forgot about Geo for a split second and me and this girl had that moment, you know, that moment right before you kiss before I snapped out of it and moved on. I'm not going anywhere near that girl this time, and I'm not going near anyone that I might be attracted to. I guess I should be proud that I was tempted and overcame, but it was still scary. Geo knows about the incident, and he's not that happy about it, but he knows I love him and would do anything for him. I would never intentionally hurt him.
Food today was good... I'm back down in my calories to where I want to be to lose weight. Even with eating the pizza for breakfast. I had salad for lunch and regular dinner. I might have some ice cream to put me at 1,300 calories since I'm in the low 1,200's right now. Still, it's better than the 1,900's that I was eating for the past couple of days. It's funny how what normal people eat seem so high to me, but I'm trying to lose weight, not maintain, so it's okay. I just need to make sure that I don't get too used to being so low on calories that when I hit my goal weight I freak out about eating that many calories in a day like I am now.
Oh, and Ann.. my doctor knows how I use my klonopin, for sleep. I've tried other things, and I like klonopin best. I was put on it for anxiety, and now just use it for sleep, so don't worry!
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