Longer update then expected!

Well, not too much to write since the last journal update but I need a break from work because it's giving me a headache today! So my exercise program has really paid off! I went from a somewhat "jolly" 218 to a lean mean 190! The six-pack is back and I feel good physically and mentally right now! Yeah! I still have my days (like last Saturday for some reason) where I'm just moody and miserable but most days I'm in decent humor. I think my mood swings have to do with me being an astrological Cancer as much as the whole anxiety/depression thing. Basically the anxiety is gone except for sporadic episodes but nothing like last year! Depression is still hit/miss but like I said my mood swings contribute to the overall experience. Once again, nothing like last year's debacle!    My dad is doing better and working with an attorney to try and get disability or workman's comp for the mesothelioma / asbestos exposure. He can't breathe very well so after working 12-18 hour days his entire life now he's having a hard to walking the driveway. He had better get something after all these years of work with little to show for his trouble. Life has some strange twists I guess. The saga continues...  The online dating thing has been interesting. I only signed up for 3 months as more of a social experiment. I don't want to knock anything I haven't tried first! It's kind of what I expected. The people you are interested in seem to never reply and the people you are not interested in flood you with emails! So is life I guess! I'm in a strange mood lately as I'm absolutely enjoying my new found single life but I would also like to meet some new friends as well. I would like to date without it turning into the "every Saturday night" thing! Meeting new people has been a challenge since I work from home and the office offers mostly depressing people I would rather avoid if possible.   I'm looking at maybe taking a class or something after work. I was thinking of joining a gym but I have a full gym in my basement which I use religiously. To be honest for all the years I used to attend local gyms I never actually socialized with anyone outside the gym! Maybe it's me but I'm not really into standing around talking at a gym. Lifting is my escape and I like to be alone in this adventure. I know that's not the best attitude to meet new people but...what can I say! My friends still want to go to bars and meet girls. I enjoy having a drink or two and talking to people but I'm not sure "bar" chicks are for me! I do have the advantage of looking between 24-28 (based on what new people estimate my age) but just because I look young doesn't mean I act like a goof! Truthfully I was tired of meeting bar chicks by my mid-20's! I'm also not into hanging around book stores / coffee shops either. It feels creepy unless you're actually there for a reason. I guess I'm just a goof! Whatever, right!   I've been playing my guitar again and I'm almost back to my old glory days! I've been ripping out solos that I never thought I would play again so that's inspiring! I have a huge blister on my ring finger so I'll take today off but I'm happy with the progress! I would like to find someone to jam with. My friend the Kid plays but he's such a flake and totally wacked out on pot so I can't rely on him. We have fun when we go out but like I said he's just too flaky to depend on to start a band.   Work has been really busy so I'm not going to complain. The only problem is as-soon-as I get motivated to work on one project they dump 10 odd-ball things on me and I lose motivation for the main project. It's not that big of a deal and like I said in this economy you're either swamped with work or waiting for the pink slip. I'll take the former.   I didn't think I had this much to say! I'm looking forward to spring this year for sure! I usually get a "spring fever" feeling which I always look forward to! So far I haven't felt it but hopefully as the days get warmer and the plants start to bloom it will come. I guess my short term goals are too try and meet new people, maybe make some new friends outside my ever shrinking circle and maybe find someone to date that doesn't completely suffocate me! I've learned to live in the moment rather then for the future. I spent so much time planning for the future I lost the moment. The worst part is all my so called "plans" completely fell through and none of my future plans came to fruition yet I'm still here and doing fine without ever planning it this way so I guess my point is...screw planning!! I'll just live minute to minute! I'll take advantage of opportunities when available, create my own opportunities when I can and allow the worst to happen because it will pass and whatever doesn't kill me will make me stronger! Wow, that's a long sentence!   Okay, I guess it's back to work...sigh! Updates to come...