Like a war inside me.
My depression and anxiety are at all time highs right about now. I have no motivation do do much of anything but at the same time i feel l iike i want to scream and jump out of my skin. i go from being numb to wanting to cry to being angry. I have to do all this with a smile on my face and act like its ok for my kids to not be asked questions by family friends coworkers. I fucking hate it there is so much stress i physically hurt but i still have to fake like I'm ok. I want to feel like i can breath again.
Replies
I can relate to these feelings all too well. I have severe anxiety and sometimes to the point where I have had panic attacks, hives and strange things happening with my skin. Stress and and Anxiety kill. It is super important to treat this just as you would any other illness. Your Psychological symptoms are real and you sound like you are suffering from an anxiety disorder if this is a common and frequent situation. Have you gotten any type of health or consulted a physician or psychologist. Don\'t beat yourself up. It sounds like your cortisol levels are very high. Anxiety kicks us into our \"fight and flight\" mode and the parasympathetic nervous system is no joke when it is tossed out of whack. You just need to find balance and that may require some behavioral therapy, and medication to balance it all out. Treat this as you would treat any other psychological illness or disease. Stress kills and Anxiety can and will kills us if we don\'t take care of it. Good luck to you. I\'m so sorry you are suffering from Anxiety. I suffer from severe anxiety as well. I\'m a nursing student in the middle of pharmacology right now, so I can relate to how you feel on a personal level and I am also gaining the medical knowledge to know that anxiety is a really really bad thing that needs to be taken care of. Good luck to you. I hope you find an oasis in the middle of this awful storm.
If you do some really heavy duty exercise like running an intense sprint or something that causes you to sweat really bad, that will lower your cortisol levels( stress hormone) will go down. If you find yourself hungry because you are hungry that is a good sign. ( not stress eating). It means parasympathetic nervous system( digestion) is focusing on digesting food again. It means that your sympathetic nervous system is not going as crazy( fight or flight nervous system) and you are closer to finding balance in the body. Means you successfully defeating stress. That is what I do. I will just run a sprint or do something really hard that makes me sweat. I hope this helps. :)