Life On The Bus
I've said this before, but it's worth repeating. To me, this board is like a bus that goes across the US.
There are always people getting on and off.
Some hardly say a thing.
Others never shut up.
There are people who get upset because they don't feel respected by their fellow travelers, and petty arguments sometimes get out of hand.
You become friends with people, then they get off and you never hear from them again. You miss them and wonder how their lives are going.
New folks get on to take their place.
The bus is never the same mix of people as it was when you got on, it is constantly changing and evolving.
This is the nature of support groups. You can never freeze them in time or go back and make them the way they used to be. But we still complain, and wish things were the way they were before.
I'm writing this as an observation, it is not meant to point out any specific behavior or blame anyone. This is not about YOU, it is about group dynamics.
Peace, Happiness, and SVR for everyone.
There are always people getting on and off.
Some hardly say a thing.
Others never shut up.
There are people who get upset because they don't feel respected by their fellow travelers, and petty arguments sometimes get out of hand.
You become friends with people, then they get off and you never hear from them again. You miss them and wonder how their lives are going.
New folks get on to take their place.
The bus is never the same mix of people as it was when you got on, it is constantly changing and evolving.
This is the nature of support groups. You can never freeze them in time or go back and make them the way they used to be. But we still complain, and wish things were the way they were before.
I'm writing this as an observation, it is not meant to point out any specific behavior or blame anyone. This is not about YOU, it is about group dynamics.
Peace, Happiness, and SVR for everyone.
Replies
Def words of wisdom, you wrote! It makes sense and I agree. I can\'t seem to get my ass off the bus! LOL
Wonderful analogy!!!
I would just add that there are parts of the bus ride that takes us through fields and clam or happy places, and then it goes through a city, a rough part of town and \"hooligans\", trouble-makers or drunken bullies get on board and think their idea of fun is to shake things up. Poke at people. Wear disguises.
Or just some deranged multiple personality poor slob gets on carrying on a loud conversation with himself in two different voices. You try to simply ignore him, but it\'s a bit scary and very uncomfortable and you\'re not at your stop yet....
That would be a problem on a school bus or a city bust or a cross country grey hound. The HCV group here is, however, supposed to be a SUPPORT group. It should be iMHO a SAFE place for people to share when they are in need of support. Why not do it in the DUMP? Kick your heels up. Play games. Curse. Rag on people..whatever!! Why? Cause fun isn\'t fun unless there are not enough people there to annoy...not a big enough audience....or because I - a main target - am not there.
I have been in LOTS of support groups for health issues. I\'m in other groups here on DS. Also in and have been and am admin of email lists and forums for other issues. I\'ve seen people come and go and i\'ve seen many a misunderstanding go ballistic with people slamming and flaming one another. But I have never in all my long life seen what I\'ve seen here.
I have stepped off the bus for now... I am finding the stress outweighing the good. I had to debate with myself whether to even tell Cat i was happy for her because I felt to do so was to dance around minefields. Not my cup of tea at all...
It is what it is. I just go with the flow. There\'s nothing here that could stress me out. That\'s why I go to work lol peace
Wise & funny I love you