Life lately
Well Ive been tossed a new problem. Im going to have less money for a while. Because my job doesn't believe in having two cashiers and they think that we should be able to do all the stocking on the night shift their pointing fingers at both me and Josh. You don't have time to stock at a gas station when your slammed. I texted my manager and she said that there will never be two cashiers. So my pay is being cut from working 4 days a week to 3. Because she hired a fourth person. I bet that person wont be able to keep up because even Josh says most gas stations when you have X amount of customer you should have two people. I'm connecting with people I know from around the scene and might be able to get an at home job down the line when they are hiring... In the mean time I accidently disputed a charge from my college because I didn't recognize it so I have to reschedule the cna test. I'm still going to try to be a flight attendant. But honestly when your looking for a job you have to have as many avenues going as you can.
I think I made a new friend in Kansas City Missouri. She wants me to move there... I think they have tornadoes. But they have okay rent compared to this hell hole. My rent went from 1200 to 2500 back in 2018, all of Utah now has this issue. Section 8 housing has got a waiting list ( I shit you not ) ten fucking years. I have no idea where the hell life is taking me. Sometimes I feel lost. But I have to keep moving forward. Ive been visiting a psychologist and a psychiatrist. My psychologist has talked to me about 3 times.... well I should say listened to me yap and made small comments three times. I am trying to get on Spravado. If I get denied then I will ask the psychiatrist to put me on wellbutrin I guess. Someone said to me that it can give you seizures??
Maybe I should write down a plan.....
Get spravado or wellbutrin out of the way
then finish CNA test
Apply at jobs
save up money
move.
Im in the middle of two books right now I read a few pages here and there. Im reading Decisive by Chip Heath. So far Things that it recommends you do: Avoid confirmation bias because it is self serving information. Short term emotion can make you have bad decisions.Both Invest and prevent . Widen your options reality test your assumptions attain distance before deciding and prepare to be wrong. Find someone who has solved your problem. When you have the words Whether or not come up in your head a red flag needs to go off because it means you are narrowing your options.
The second book Im in the middle of is The Oral history of punk. Iggy Pop his band and Nico Case talk about their aventures back in the 70s when punk first came out. It also talks about artists like Penny Arcade and drag queen Jayne County. I think the rest of the book is going to talk about the Ramones and other punk bands. I tell you what after reading this and being friends with my friend Jay I am so happy I dont have any addiction problems. Holy shit it ruins your life! I'm so glad I helped him get on social security.
Other than that being punk back then was definetly frowned upon and I think the goverment made main stream music more popular because they didn't want people to hear the truth. The exploited sings alot about screwed up things the goverment has done. They consider it anti patriotic. Which is stupid becuase what they really want is just a bunch of mindledss idiots working 40 hours a week and not questioning a damn thing and not getting involved. How is that really actually helping us? Were not solving problems. Weve become zombies.
Anyway.... I hope your doing okay and I hope life guides you on a nice path..
Goodnight Cheers
Replies
Your boss sounds like they do not value their employees. This is a bad sign. But you know that. You are reading two interesting books and have a good plan worked up. Things will get better for you.
hi, I was mistaken; thought you are in Maine for some reason. This is a journal that's real. This is my first impression reading this. It actually reminds me of some penpal letters when I was younger. Anyway, it's nice to hear that you're holding your own. Although with challenges. I worked at a gas station when I was in school. It was right off the highway, super busy, and we had to have 2 people if you wanted to get anything else done but the register.
The books sound interesting. I haven't had the change to read much. Been studying and training for the volunteer EMS work I've been doing. You can never learn enough about BLS and ALS. It's kind of intense. There's a pretty nice, small nursing home near me that is offering CNA licensing if you commit to working some hours a week. I'm thinking about doing one night to pay for a car payment. I work for myself and manage but winter can be fickle so I wouldn't mind being sure of a steady small income.
My senior year of high school had a few friends into punk, so I'm a little familiar. One friend and I went to NYC for a Pink Floyd show and got a room at the Chelsey Hotel (think that's the spelling. Was told the hotel had some history with Sid and Nancy staying there. We somehow mentioned to a few people where we were staying and that it would be fun to continue the night after the show. About 25 people showed up and I was a little overwhelmed with some of the guests who seemed like addicts, not an easy life...
'We're not solving problems....' yeah, that's the hard truth, isn't it? Reality test your assumptions... Wise! and rare.
There was a movingly beautiful sunset this evening. All day I was working outside making and painting cabinet parts for a customer. I felt so fortunate to be working at home on such a nice day. By the barn overlooking the fields and New England stone walls everywhere. I went in the garden through the day to eat from the Earth. All the greens and vegetables. The cherry tomatoes (sungold yellow) over 8 feet high are putting out so much I have to keep picking or they just burst with ripeness and then, those are the ones I snack on. I love when people ask me what do I eat as a vegetarian and I show them a picture of the garden and harvest pics. The root cellar held pumpkin, squash, potatoes, onions and garlic till spring last year. I've been gardening all my life and these last few years have been very difficult. Last year I was bringing water up from the pond because the drought was so long. This year I haven't had to water since June 10th. instead I have been dealing with all the, too much water, issues.
Keep up the life game as best you can:) J
Good For You!!! So hard to face changes which effect your finances!! I don't know if this will help or not, but it's how I managed to pay off my mortgage 7 years ahead of time. I get social security and a pension a fixed amount each month. After paying all my bills, and a deposit the next month, I take what is left from my new balance and pay down mortgage. If you haven't got a Roth IRA, I'd suggest you look into that as Social Security is Very Unstable...and you need to think about your future.
Your writing suggests you a re open to all avenues and are not backing down from challenges!!! I do hope your CNA exam will go well for you! Many Many Years Ago, I too was a CNA in the hospital....with aging population growing exponentially, your services and knowledge will be a gate way to employment!!!
I listened to this this am and found that on this Bright Crisp Sunny Day, 67 degrees...it brought me back to my two mantra words since I turned 70 Accept and Adapt....and my Dear Brother would say, Just A Blip In The Grand Scheme Of Life....most things I have found that I fear usually don't happen...sadly our brains tend towards the negative....what we 'think' we attract!!
Wishing you The Best Beautiful Day You Can Have~~Flow Like Water and let the confusion flow off your shoulders :) Hugs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UksqfSwaOew