Life is a mess

I am on meds now. I am feeling ok. But I wanted to feel ok without them. I have made a lot of plans a few days ago but when crisis come I have no guts to keep them. It is really sucks. Sounds like my life will lbe ike that forever. Am I ever going to reach my dreams? If I am giving two steps forward and two backwards, how can I reach my dreams? I feel hopeless. Hate seen my life is a mess.