Life has been very difficult
Hey everyone I am sorry it has been so long since I have been here. Life has just been throwing me 1 curve ball after another. My health has been horrible. And trying to figure everything out has been a long journey and I am still not there. But closer, I have just gone from 10 different doctors to 12. Try keeping that one straight, it is not easy.
Well we are down to just over 60 days to my oldest sons wedding. My mom bought my dress for me. I have my sandals to wear. Just have to figure out my jewlery, then it will be getting nails done the friday before and hair the morning of. I am still angry that Jerred is not here for this special day but have settled down some about it. Jerreds birthday was on July 11th and this was the worst one yet. Actually my PTSD flared up and this has never happened before. I was on such a rollercoaster of emotions it was aweful. I was going from very happy to extremely angry in seconds. This week it has finally settled down. This year on August 10th it will be 25 years since he became my angel boy. Been praying very hard that it will be tolerable to get through, at least easier than his birthday.
Hugs to all,
Susie
Replies
Thank you for sharing your thoughts today. Hope the wedding goes good and it gives you something to look forward to. I haven't been to a wedding in a very, very long time. I know that roller coaster of emotions. You wonder how we can go from happy to angry in an instant, at least I wonder that. Tights hugs, Nell
So sorry that your health brings so many challenges and hopeful that in the midst you have some pockets of peace even for just a moment or two. Grief with not feeling well physically is a hard one to carry.
I was remembering the wedding coming up and I understand how Jerred will be missed. I have no doubt he will make his presence known as I believe our children want to be a part of our everyday lives.
Good to hear from you, Susie, and sending you healing (((hugs))) and light.
XO Joanie
I hope you feel better soon. It is so difficult not feeling well and missing our children. I hope you feel well on the wedding day and that the wedding brings you the joy and peace of new beginnings. Sending well wishes and hopes for some peace to find you during these difficult times. Sending love, Leda
Thank you each of you. There are so many different things going on with my health and has been for a year and a half now. I just want to quit fighting but know that is not the answer either. Plus I could NOT do that to my boys or grandkids. It is just so exhausting. I had wanted to lose at least 50 pounds before the wedding and have not lost a pound. That is the joy of the weight gain being from meds not food. My diet is how it should be so I am being sent to an endocrinologist. Sounds great except I can not get into see him until September 3rd, 20 days before the wedding. Grrrrrrrr.
I am very excited for the wedding and so happy that my son has finally found his soul mate am just praying that all the pain I am experiencing eases up and fast so I can at least try to do some walking again.
Hugs and Blessings
Susie
Oh Susie, I'm so sorry your health is such a challenge. I've not been well myself and the chronic pain & illness can be downright depressing! And I find my emotions regarding my son are much harder to manage when I'm home a lot & not feeling well.
This journey has so many ups and downs. Come here and journal when you feel that way. I find it helps to get it out and we all understand. Message me anytime too.
Enjoy the wedding and may you feel Jerred close by. May you feel better soon. Healing hugs sent.
Love, Linda ♡