Lets catch up!

Hello all, I have to say im a bit embarrassed with my lack of attendance on DS lately! I have not forgotten all of my amazing friends... sorry Ive been MIA! Im not sure where to start... I turned over to my 8 Month mark on Feb. 10th. WOW unbelievable how time has flied in a way.Looking back there were days in my first few months that I couldnt possibly make it this far. There were days when a year of coumadin treatment seemed so far away and here I am looking back thinking. HOLY SH*T, I am 4 months away from getting off coumadin. With that said the onset of butterflies in my tummy has been happening more often pertaining to the thoughts of leaving my security blanket behind. I have had all genetics done twice (neg).... one more time when I come off and then im home free. It amazes me that I do not think about blood clots 24/7 any longer. I write this so those of you who are in the stage now ( a few months post) and think this is your new life...and  that your life will revolve around the viscosity of your blood... dont worry it wont. So on to my relationship saga! I have moved back in with my girlfriend toward the third week in January due to a horrible fight with mom, turns out she loved me enough not to let me suffer at home. So I moved in that weekend, and all has been well. Seems like thankfully, our relationship is on the mend. We have been having great weekends and nice nights together. I have to say that the 5 or 6 sessions with my therapist may have actually helped us to understand eachother better. As obviously my pe didnt only effect me emotionally. I did put a lot of pressure on my gf, an unhealthy amount and that was unfair. I am happy back at home with my gf and my kitten, life has seemed to resumed back to 'normality'. We are planning on redecorating the living room and getting a new couch ( when we are both financially stable ) and maybee painting our apartment...fun fun fun. I think its sweet because although I know my gf wants a new couch ...she really lets me indulge in all of the other things surrounding the decorating hehe.  Kitten is doing good, gained a pound, and hes getting bigger infront of my eyes. I am planning on getting him neutered and possibly declawed in the next month or so. So work has been ....not so good. I work(ed) as an administrative assistant to a small company for almost a year now, unfortunately business has been ....no so good. So my boss has been nuts she has been screaming at me and blaming me for things i didnt do and such, you all know how it goes. It got so bad that for the last couple weeks I was her only employee left... her sales team disapeared before my eyes! A salesperson of 5 years left 3 weeks ago due to my bosses current behavior toward us. A little before that the rest of the small sales team left too. So its been me, watching countless new hires come and go within a weeks time because they couldnt handle my bosses nature! I became very fed up because she decided first to cut my hours which I wasnt very happy about but I took it and redid my resume knowing it was time to start the job hunt!  So the next day I come in and boss decides instead of cutting hours she just wanted to cut my pay and keep me at 40 hours a week, which got me even more annoyed bc the situation was getting rediculous. So last wednesday, at 11:00 am she flipped about a "mistake" I made went off about me loosing her business and bla bla and i just snapped and told her " fine, you wont have to worry about me making any 'mistakes' because today is my last day" I proceeded ( to my surprise as I am very passive ) to let her know exactly how I felt about how she had been treating me. I walked out of the door that day and instantly felt relieved. I started to notice that the situation was bad when I went for an inr one day after work and  my Blood pressure was high, the nurse asked if I was stressed out and i told her I was furstrated with my boss, and she said it was actually affected my BP! So the next day I took an adavan bc I was actually afraid of what I would have to deal with ...from my boss. Is that not completely rediculious??? So needless to say I am happy to be out of that mess! My boss has called me a couple times since and I havnt answered...I dont even want to hear her voice I have returned the office keys to the secretary across the way who I am friendly with. She called me on friday to let me know that my boss was talking crap about me and my work preformance, I dont take this personally because I have heard her trash everyone who walked through the doors of that business! So now the job hunt has started again, I am a little nervous with the state of the economy, but I had to get out of there! I honestly dont believe her business will be open much longer anyway. I have been unable to keep my promise to myself pertaining to my fitness goals! With the work stress I have come home practically in tears so many days. Just when I was ready to jump back on the treadmill again, I came down with a lovely cold on sunday! My boss had been coughing on me for days ( YUCK ) no manors.... and I was surprised I had avoided the flu bug this season, however I didnt escape. So sunday I had a runny nose, and a sore throat! Now im on to the stuffy nose and sneezing with the occasional cough...Im sure I will feel better in a few days but grrr anyways! Going to get my inr done tomorrow, once I know my level nurse said shed give me the ok to take some sudafed! On top of all of this, I got my period practically the same time as the cold - Talk about double whammy! I had a fabulous v-day I spent a day with my gf just spontainiously going places and I ended up at my salon that evening chopping my hair. I had been wanting bangs for sometime, but holding back out of fear, my hair has been pretty much the same for years and years...but something in me finally said What the hell, live. and so I did. We both got a hair cut so it was kinda fun. Im stiill getting used to the bangs but people have said they look cute so I hope they do lol!  So I have many many goals lolOnce my cold has subsided I need to get on my treadmill and go to town on loosing my extra weight! I also need to focus on getting a job as I know that in this economy it will be  extra hard! I need to really work on my self esteem somehow, Im always so hard on myself, especially now with this new hair do, I sometimes think it was a hair dont ... but  I dunno!  As for pe related things - Chest aches have been very minimum since I last journaled. I get a minor ache once and while that may last a few minutes, sometimes infact I think it is actually indegestion or something. Heart rate seems to be pretty normal, Mine is normally on the high side of normal anyway, but im my normal which is good! I think a lot of my heart rate racing where a lot of anxiety based episodes.... sometimes i check my pulse with my watch when im petting the cat and it will be like 70 or something which is really calm for me. My normal resting rate is between 75-85...but sometimes in the morning or if im really calm its lower, when im active its 90-115 or so... Inr has been ok, not super consistant but its been within range so Ill be happy with that... last few weeks it has been 3.0, 2.5 ,2.2 ...I wonder if itll be a little whacked since Im down with a cold.  I guess for a bit being unemployeed will be a nice break just to breathe and take in the changes in my life... However this vaca cant be too long as I do have rent and bills to pay grrr. I will keep in touch with you guys now that I will have some more time!Hoping all of my good friends are doing well! MAUH   P.S. funny enough Im noticing more and more recently that I am transending the 'me' I used to be. the old me pre pe. I wouldnt have told my boss how I felt about her way of treating me. I would have either sat there and took it or not come back the next day if it got that bad, I was very impressed with the way I stood up for myself. The old me wouldnt have made the spontanious decision to go and finally try a new hair cut. Seems like even though I have low self esteem and issues like that, I am able to put a value on myself and remember that my life is important and should be enjoyable so I shouldnt have to take some crazy lady screaming at me, or chicken out on cutting my hair the way Ive wanted for a while bc i wont look good. It seems that most of the changes im noticing are good, and some of them really surprise me. I have found these recent self discoveries really exciting and interesting. Although I do not like the memories, pain, or anxiety I have gained from this pe... I know that I wouldnt have made these changes if not for the episode that is causing my evolution.