Let's try this......

I miss my granddaughter....... I have put myself in a position of not having Layla as much as I would love. I have to be able to prove to my son-in-law I'm not drinking and I'm not sure how other than living with him. Tha'ts not going to happen. My schedule won't really allow AA meetings right now and I'm not crazy about them. If I trip my son thinks I'm drinking. I don't go out or socialize at work. I'm stumped. He said he would like me to get a personal sponser to call when I feel like a drink but what good would that do? Does he want random drug test? He's paying for it....

I know stopping is the best thing for me personal not even considering Layla. I know that but there is a part of me that feels I'm paying in a way for his Grandfather. He has also made comments about he wishes I was less involved with things. Is this how he is trying to make that happen? I feel its part of it. I have always made sure not to step on his and Michelle's toes as far as how they want Layla raised. I've never taken her any where with out premission. I make sure Layla stays in touch when she is at my house and that they have pictures to see. But me having one drink after she had gone to bed over rids every good thing and how much I need her in my life. I feel like please sir may I have another hour with my grandaughter......