Laughing In The Rain

I've been stealing jokes again....      My husband and I divorced over religious differences.  He      thought he was God and I didn't.      I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.      Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.      Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.      You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me          I'm not a complete idiot -- I've got some missing parts.       Out of my mind.   I don't know if I'll come back...       NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the room-spinning       medicine.       God must love stupid people;  you're still here.       Consciousness: That annoying in time between naps.       Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!       Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I       Grew up.       Procrastinate Now!       A hangover is the wrath of grapes.       A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance       Stupidity is not a handicap.  Park elsewhere!       They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.       He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.       I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on. Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!  Life is too shortand friends are too few.