Life...

... I tried, I really did try to be positive about everything, listening to my friends trying to set each other up, of course I never received a mention  :( I smiled, but one knew from my eyes the smile wasn't real. I wanted to tell him what was wrong, what I do to myself...I couldn't, he had such a good night I couldn't ruin it for him. Now they want to go out for the next two nights as well...I'm really not sure I can manage that.  Especially Wednesday when everyone, but me, is being set up.   I also cut myself again, deep this time.  I wanted to make sure I felt this, to purge some feelings as it were. Im sorry for those who want me to be positive....I tried. Still trying, I just cant quite get the knack of it.  :(  Help...