Kidney Stone Pain

On April 21st, I finally broke down and went to the doctor.  I had been experiencing a dull ache in my left side for several weeks.  My husband had been encouraging me to go... "you're going to die" he'd say... "I'm not going to die" I'd say.  Finally, the pain had crescendoed to a point where I needed to have it looked at.  I thought it might be a kidney stone... but I wasn't sure.  I had a kidney stone in high school.  The pain I felt was indescribable, but it was also intermittent.  None of was what I had been feeling.

The doctor had me give a urine sample.  The results came back pretty quickly.  There was lots of microscopic blood in my urine.  The most likely culprit... a kidney stone.  They sent me to their imaging offices to have an ultrasound done.  I could tell a lot from the technicians face.  It would scrunch up in a look of concern.  There was a stone... and it was pretty big she said.  We'll have the radiologist read the images and get back with your physician on next steps.

I headed back to work.  Never in a million years would I have thought to do anything different.  We were having a job fair and I was needed at the event.  Just before I pulled into the parking lot at work, my phone rang.  It was my doctor.  The kidney stone is blocking the ureter and it is too large to pass.  I needed to get to the Emergency Room that evening.  I asked to confirm...  The ER??? Really??? Yes, she said you need to get to the ER.  So, I told work what was up, called my husband and off to the ER we went.

I felt like a fool at the ER.  I wasn't in terrible pain.  Why was I there?  The ER did a CT scan and gave me a shot of a pretty powerful pain reliever... So powerful, that I didn't feel a thing after they were done.  A couple of hours later, the doctor returned and handed me a telephone.  It was the urologist.  I had two options - one option was to break up the stone using ESWL, but he was afraid that would create a lot of debris which would need to be passed.  The other option was to remove the stone using ureteroscopy.  I opted for the second.  He told me his office would call on Monday, but to give him a call if the pain became worse over the weekend.  I was determined not to make that call.

The hospital discharged me with a prescription for a narcotic pain reliever - to be used only as needed.  I was also told to use Ibuprofen as needed to control the pain... That was all I used for the rest of the weekend.  Wednesday morning came.  No food or drink after midnight the night before, showers the night before and morning of the surgery, comfortable clothes, moved from room to room, hospital gown, preparation underway.  I was a mess.  I was so scared of what was to come.  I started crying.  My husband tried to comfort me, but he couldn't.  It was all very scary.  I wasn't afraid of the surgery... I knew I'd be unconscious for that part.  I was afraid of what I'd feel afterward.  My priest came.  He prayed with me and anointed me with healing oils.  It was comforting.  I'm glad he was able to make it.  The anesthesiologist came in... I don't remember much after.

I woke up a few hours later.  Disoriented - that's to be expected - but feeling relatively OK.  I had trouble standing.  The world spun around me.  The hospital told me they needed me to use the restroom before they could discharge me.  Conveniently I had to go.  I've read online of people who described their urine as tomato soup after the surgery.  That described mine to a tee.  It was dark red from the blood and there were blood clots... lots of blood clots.  It was a bit scary, but I knew beforehand to expect it so it wasn't such a shock.  It was the only time I saw that amount of blood in my urine.  The nurse wheeled me out of the hospital and we were off to the races.

The first day, I experienced moderate discomfort and a need to urinate... all of the time.  My husband took me to the grocery store so we could fill the prescriptions.  In the 30 minutes or so that we were there, I went to the bathroom three times.  It was awful.

My stone was 14mm.  It was large enough that he wasn't able to get it out in a single surgery, so I have to return for round two tomorrow afternoon.  In the week since my surgery, the need to urinate has decreased, but the feeling of needing to go has become more ever-present.  The pain is much worse after the surgery than before.  For one, I have the classic kidney stone pains... Sharp, but intermittent.  I believe that is because I now have lots of smaller stones that are moving around and trying to pass.  The pain in my urinary tract from the stent has become difficult to bear.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow.  I want this stone out of my body.  At the same time, I'm scared of what pain I might experience post surgery.  What's worse, my husband is leaving to visit family out of town on Thursday.  He offered to cancel his flight, but in a moment of bravado, I told him not to.  I wish he had... but I don't want to deprive him of the opportunity to see his family or get away from home either.  He has been an angel this past week.  I know its been hard on him.  When the pains have hit, he is helpless to do anything to help me.  That's life, but it isn't a good feeling.

I've been able to do some work from home this past week - I even went in for a couple of hours on Friday and yesterday.  I won't be able to do that while he is gone.  When the pain is heavy enough that I need to take the narcotic, I can't drive.  My husband has been my link to and from work, but he won't be here.  Truthfully, I probably shouldn't be working right now anyway.  I've only managed to be at work a few hours and then I was in quite a bit of pain when I left...  But this is peak time for us and I can't imagine being away from work.  It is crazy that the modern workplace puts such a demand on us, that we feel compelled to work even to the detriment of our health and well-being.  I'm applying for FMLA next week... and I feel bad about doing it.  At the same point, I've been with this company for 9 years and in all of that time, I can count on one hand the number of sick days I've taken.  Why should I feel guilty when I need it?

This has been one of the roughest experiences of my life.  I'm ready for it to be over.  I'm praying round two is able to successfully remove the stone.  I'm praying that the worst is behind me.  I'm scared that I'm in for more of the same.