Keynote speech a success!!

Wow, thank you all for flooding me with notes of support this week! It really helped! I speak at conferences all the time, and love it, but this one had me nervous. I was speaking to a large group of professionals, including several political figures in our state, and I wanted to do very well.  One of my patients wrote an introduction for me, which I was not allowed to read in advance. I heard it for the first time as it was read to the group. She was so kind, and talked about how she had felt worthless, betrayed, and ugly after her rape but that working in therapy with me has helped her feel none of those things anymore, and that she is a proud survivor. She urged the audience to see me as a mentor in rape work, which meant a lot; not many men earn that kind of endorsement from a rape survivor. I told the audience i wanted a copy to send to me mom. And also to my wife's mom. (laughter!) I began by telling them about a patient who asked me once, what makes ME, a therapist, proud of the women I work with? I read the list I had compiled (which I have also posted here before), and got many laughs and nods of agreement.  I told them that when I first started doing rape work a decade ago, I was enlightened by the many young women who would always ask, "can i talk to you later in private?" after a presentation, and that they--not any literature or research--is where my real education came from. If it were not for survivors sharing their stories with me, this work could not happen.  I also discussed a new national study that has found that sexual assault rates have dropped by TWO-THIRDS since 1993, and that reporting rates have DOUBLED. This means that more women are coming forward, and in short, WE ARE WINNING. Huge applause!  I then discussed research into what helps women decide whether to report, and I told them about a few interview-based studies. My emphasis was on what they, as rape workers, can do to communicate your willingness to be supportive, so that women will not feel dread or disbelieved when they come forward. I then talked about how rape workers manage our own emotions, and how this is more than a job, a paycheck, to any of us. Many comments and nods of agreement. To end the talk, I said I wanted to show them how far a survivor can come, so that we can all be reminded why we do this work. I told them about my patient, Shannon (who is also my primary book collaberator and DS forum member under a pseudonym), who had seen four previous therapists with zero training in rape.  I described how awfully they had treated her, and that she came to therapy with me fully pessimistic that anything would help, and she had a suicide plan in place. She had said to me on day one, "I just think you should know that I have issues with men." (the audience giggles in recognition of this truth). I had responded to her,"I think you should know, that so do I!" (the audience busts out laughing because, well hell, it's true!). I read her journal from the first week of her therapy, which was so dark and grisly, so self-despising. The words of a girl coming to give up.  Then I read her journal from the final week of her therapy, in which she had written a "letter to a future survivor." (I intend to include it in my book). It is so hopeful, so encouraging, so eloquent, so poetic, so powerful...the audience was literally in tears. This letter was to THEM, because so many of them are also survivors.  I ended with Shannon's final words of hope, followed by, "Now go forth, and make a difference." Thunderous applause. Women from crisis centers all over the state came to talk to me, and asked me to come visit their rape centers and conduct trainings. They kept telling me how much the talk had meant to them, and that they were so happy to see someone involved. I really felt lifted and renewed. And thirsty. :)