Keeping the faith......
I am still trying to wrap my head around the fact that our youngest son, T-Man, apologized for his "shitty" behavior (as he put it) in high school. He said he cannot believe that we stood by him and never gave up. It certainly helped that we got healthier - setting boundaries and did better in not enabling him. He's telling us he's doing better in school (a few A's on his last projects) and seems determined to make up the classes he had in the first quarter.
That said - I know he's still smoking pot. I couldn't help but check his backpack he left by the front door, after arriving home for spring break. I know he's using and I know I didn't need to look, but I did because I guess I needed "proof" so I can talk to him. Not that it will change anything but like my other son ~ it still needs to be said. Husband ended up talking to our middle son and, of course, J minimized the fact that he has a few liquor bottles and a dozen assorted beer bottles under his bed - saying that they have been under there for a long time and "forgot" about them. Yeah - right. Husband was so cavalier about it when telling me - that I jumped in when he told me our son's reply and then I said "You know he's not telling the truth". Maybe it's the way my husband said it or his laid back approach (like he bought that lame explanation) - but it bothers me when he acts as if he believes it. Husband didn't appreciate me commenting. Whatever. I know he probably handled it well and I should mind my own business but - crap. I just can't help it sometimes.
So my advocacy work is what is helping me and keeping me afloat, and thank goodness I have that because - like the line in the Serenity Prayer says "the courage to change the things I can" - and that's what I'm doing. It does take courage because sometimes - things I'd like changed - isn't easy to accomplish because of the mindset of some people, and the fact that it's a highly stigmatized subject. Uncomfortable. Public speaking is uncomfortable too sometimes. I don't like doing it but my passion overrides it for me.
That said ~ more exciting things appear to be happening in that department. Along with me doing a talk in Washington and presenting our program at our local middle school - we were asked to do one at another area community. And then yesterday I met with a drug counselor/educator of adolescent teen drug use and she made a proposal - hoping to include us in a program that they are working on that will include a monetary compensation. The best part of being included in this (although the $ is good) it's the idea we get to share the message.
That said - I know he's still smoking pot. I couldn't help but check his backpack he left by the front door, after arriving home for spring break. I know he's using and I know I didn't need to look, but I did because I guess I needed "proof" so I can talk to him. Not that it will change anything but like my other son ~ it still needs to be said. Husband ended up talking to our middle son and, of course, J minimized the fact that he has a few liquor bottles and a dozen assorted beer bottles under his bed - saying that they have been under there for a long time and "forgot" about them. Yeah - right. Husband was so cavalier about it when telling me - that I jumped in when he told me our son's reply and then I said "You know he's not telling the truth". Maybe it's the way my husband said it or his laid back approach (like he bought that lame explanation) - but it bothers me when he acts as if he believes it. Husband didn't appreciate me commenting. Whatever. I know he probably handled it well and I should mind my own business but - crap. I just can't help it sometimes.
So my advocacy work is what is helping me and keeping me afloat, and thank goodness I have that because - like the line in the Serenity Prayer says "the courage to change the things I can" - and that's what I'm doing. It does take courage because sometimes - things I'd like changed - isn't easy to accomplish because of the mindset of some people, and the fact that it's a highly stigmatized subject. Uncomfortable. Public speaking is uncomfortable too sometimes. I don't like doing it but my passion overrides it for me.
That said ~ more exciting things appear to be happening in that department. Along with me doing a talk in Washington and presenting our program at our local middle school - we were asked to do one at another area community. And then yesterday I met with a drug counselor/educator of adolescent teen drug use and she made a proposal - hoping to include us in a program that they are working on that will include a monetary compensation. The best part of being included in this (although the $ is good) it's the idea we get to share the message.
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