just waking up
I'm feeling better. The worst of the PMS craziness has passed : )
However i am still sad with the 5th month angelversary coming up. My boyfriend and sister both believe my doctor is purposefully waiting to give my test results back so i will run out of time to sue her. I JUST WANT TO KNOW!! I don't understand why the nurse in delivery told me that there were bruises from the cord around Sophia's neck and it seemes like it was only her little face that was bruised, and then my stupid doctor turned around and said there was no bruises from the cord.
That would be such a weight lifted if they would just say "it was the cord." I was ok when it was because of something i couldn't control or stop. But this not knowing... After reading the march of dimes website i'm wondering if i didn't eat enough, my doctor should have told me i didn't gain weight!! Sophia was only 5lb 4oz! Or maybe she had Down's or some other syndrome.
And i wouldn't be so angry at my doctor if she hadn't just left me like that. She promised to come back and help me deliver, but she never showed back up. She never even wrote out my prescriptions she just bolted and didn't look back. And if they had done a third trimester or even five month ultrasound they would have seen she wasn't gaining much weight. that little voice in my head just finds things to blame on myself.
Everywhere are pregnant women and babies. And i wish i knew the joy that comes after delivery when you hold your healthy baby and take her home.
However i am still sad with the 5th month angelversary coming up. My boyfriend and sister both believe my doctor is purposefully waiting to give my test results back so i will run out of time to sue her. I JUST WANT TO KNOW!! I don't understand why the nurse in delivery told me that there were bruises from the cord around Sophia's neck and it seemes like it was only her little face that was bruised, and then my stupid doctor turned around and said there was no bruises from the cord.
That would be such a weight lifted if they would just say "it was the cord." I was ok when it was because of something i couldn't control or stop. But this not knowing... After reading the march of dimes website i'm wondering if i didn't eat enough, my doctor should have told me i didn't gain weight!! Sophia was only 5lb 4oz! Or maybe she had Down's or some other syndrome.
And i wouldn't be so angry at my doctor if she hadn't just left me like that. She promised to come back and help me deliver, but she never showed back up. She never even wrote out my prescriptions she just bolted and didn't look back. And if they had done a third trimester or even five month ultrasound they would have seen she wasn't gaining much weight. that little voice in my head just finds things to blame on myself.
Everywhere are pregnant women and babies. And i wish i knew the joy that comes after delivery when you hold your healthy baby and take her home.
Replies
I am glad to hear that you are feeling better. I think we just hit these rough patches and it takes a few days for us to get thru them. I am having one right now, but to see that you are doing better, makes me feel a bit better. I know that you are unsure about wanting the results, but I really think that you should call the doctors office and see if they recieved them. They have to be honest with you. Most doctors wont say that the cord was the definite cause of death, but they will tell you if it is a possibility. And even if they dont find anything, at least you know. As you know, they did not find any cause of death for Kaylee, but finally having all of the results in makes me feel more at east. At least now I know that there is not anything seriuosly wrong with me. I really think it will make you feel more at ease.
As for pregnant woman, I too see them everywhere I go! There is no avoiding them I swear. I see atleast 1 a day. I am learning to try and only look up at people\'s faces!
Hugs!!