Just thoughts...

Well, still have my headache from yesterday.  I think alot of my problem with wanting a quick relationship with Spanky is that the world is getting crazier by the minute.  We have tornados here all the time and our town totally flooded last month.  People are killing people and jobs are being taken away.  Gas prices are increasing and prices of everything goes up with it.  I'm afraid that one of us will come down with some ailment and we will either be unable to function properly or even die from it.  I'm afraid that the kids will be too old and not want to do things as a family and not want to play anymore and i'll miss out on watching them grow up.  I want someone to be there for me. And I don't want some stranger!  I want the man that I knew meant something to me.  I don't want to wait 10 years for my chance at happiness with him again.  I know that I need to work on myself and get better.  Those thoughts though, just don't leave my mind easily.