JUST TALKING TO MYSELF & GOD, I CAN DO THAT LOL
Well this has been a crazy but short work week - I only worked two days and it felt like 5. I thank God for the distraction because I was getting a little too fixated on the surgery which had me on an emotional rollercoaster. I know it is getting close but I can't let the what ifs consume me into a state of anxiety. I am getting more excited because i know this is a busy month both on my job and the final pre-op appointments so I anticipate that January is going to fly by.
In as much as my day is growing closer, I also know that I have to start to prioritize my life to fit in the rigorous schedule following the surgery. What to eat, when to eat, how many calories, how much protein, vitamins and things as little/big as water consumption that will now become my lifeline.
As I read all the post I am excited yet apprehensive because it is a tremendous life adjustment. I know me and I know that my biggest problem is time management when it comes to my own health. I can run circles around everybody else's business and I can multitask around the best at work, but I fail to stop and do something so simple as eating lunch now, so I'm highly concerned about failing when it comes to keeping on track of my own nourishment post surgery.
I guess the will to live will kick in because if I don't I will do more harm than good to myself. lunch now, how am I going to get this under control.
The closer I get to this date I find myself spinning out of control emotionally - the ups and downs of the impending surgery and lifestyle change are both exciting and scary causing major anxiety at time. I'm reading up on WLS and pulling information from everyone who has gone before me in preparation everyday, but it is a lot to take in. Okay time to get a grip, I need to take this one second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time, coupled with much prayer if I am going to get through this.
If there is a silver lining at the end of this rainbow and I believe there is, I am overjoyed on another level because my mom who I have been estranged from off and on for the past 20 years is back strong in my life, God is healing our relationship and I just found out that she will be here around the time of my surgery straight to my birthday and that brought a sense of relief to my heart. I don't care who you are or how old you get - something about mommy's presence always gives you a sense of security. So God I thank you in advance for your perfect timing in restoring our relationship.
In as much as my day is growing closer, I also know that I have to start to prioritize my life to fit in the rigorous schedule following the surgery. What to eat, when to eat, how many calories, how much protein, vitamins and things as little/big as water consumption that will now become my lifeline.
As I read all the post I am excited yet apprehensive because it is a tremendous life adjustment. I know me and I know that my biggest problem is time management when it comes to my own health. I can run circles around everybody else's business and I can multitask around the best at work, but I fail to stop and do something so simple as eating lunch now, so I'm highly concerned about failing when it comes to keeping on track of my own nourishment post surgery.
I guess the will to live will kick in because if I don't I will do more harm than good to myself. lunch now, how am I going to get this under control.
The closer I get to this date I find myself spinning out of control emotionally - the ups and downs of the impending surgery and lifestyle change are both exciting and scary causing major anxiety at time. I'm reading up on WLS and pulling information from everyone who has gone before me in preparation everyday, but it is a lot to take in. Okay time to get a grip, I need to take this one second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time, coupled with much prayer if I am going to get through this.
If there is a silver lining at the end of this rainbow and I believe there is, I am overjoyed on another level because my mom who I have been estranged from off and on for the past 20 years is back strong in my life, God is healing our relationship and I just found out that she will be here around the time of my surgery straight to my birthday and that brought a sense of relief to my heart. I don't care who you are or how old you get - something about mommy's presence always gives you a sense of security. So God I thank you in advance for your perfect timing in restoring our relationship.
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