Just Rambling, Rambling & Some Venting!
Pretty much all through my life I alway's prided myself and fancy'd myself to be a person who isn't very easily "suckered into anything"! But since waking up early this morning, I've been kicking myself is the a** "big time" kicking myself in the a** for being a sucker to my ex-fiance for the better part of a year and a half.
How do these people do it? How do these people, some born and some taught to have deception in their hearts! How do these people get away with the smoke screens and the one trick pony shows? How does a person keep another person under their spell for slightly over 1.5 years? How does a person like that justify playing tricks and games and toying with another persons heart?
How can a person advertise who they are when courting them into a relationship and after the relationship is secure, how can that person "flick a switch" and change on a dime? How can someone who claimed to be "all that" go from "all that" to "all nothing"? How can a person when courting them, how can they sit there on Skype and with a straight face tell another person, like me, who's going into relations with them, how can they sit there and lie to me and tell me such things like "oh yeah, I'm my own person" and "I think for myself, I'm very independent" and "I do what I want" and "I do what I want, where I want and how I want"! Really.......Really.......oh yeah......Really!?!?!?!?!
So she was her "own thinker" and she was "so called" independent? Then why...oh why....did such a strong free thinking person give up all her powers of choice to her own Father? Why was it after I stopped the out flow of money to her parents months before the breakup, why didn't she speak up then? Why didn't she use her "so called" powers of choice and speak up right there and then and at least tell me "I'm a bad person for not wanting to help out her parents anymore"! Why? Why was it then after she started in the dark of the night, with cell phone in hand, why would she make her way out of the home, into the little park here on property and basically ask her Father what to do, and more importantly, listen to him!
You were a "so called" free thinker, you bragged about your ability to choose and plan things out for yourself, at least you did when we first had our relationship being perpetuated over such things like Skype and Facebook in the beginning. You liked to go off and tell me, face to face on our screens that you had your life under control, you got plans, you got it all figured out, you are your own person! Really? Then what was with the listening to your Father in the final stages of our engagement? What was up with listening to him ramble on and try to inject his "guilt trips" upon you after I stopped the out flow of the money? What was up with listening to your Father about the whole "I placed my hands upon the family cross, was hit with a powerful message from God, he told me that Aaron was bad news, Aaron was evil, Your Daughter needs to break it off and get away, and your Daughter needs to find a way home.......quickly!
So where was that "so called" free thinking? Where was your "so called" power of choice? Where was your "I am am my own person"? Where was your ability to "do as you want, when you want, how you want and where you want"? Where was the "so called" independent woman I fell in love with, where did that woman go, why did that woman in the end crumble into such a "Daddy's little girl"! Why did you give up on everything you claimed to hold so dear? Why was it now more important to listen to a person who was 2000 miles away vs. listening to me, listening to me when I would have said such things like "let's sit down and try and talk this out" or "let's sit down and try to have a understanding about all of this", but no, you even took my ability to request all that out of my hands, and placed those options into your greedy Fathers hands, the hands who like to get drunk all the time, the hands that like to pop morphine pills and rage, the hands that have time and time again hit your very own Mother, The hands that like to lie to such institutions such as S.S.I. and the V.A., lie to them to try to get more out of them! The hands that like to poke their finger up and into their 2nd grade Daughters private parts, the hands that like smack their Daughter around a little when they don't listen to him, the hands that like to pull hand guns into their Wife's face after good old fashion beat down, the hands that like to scream to his wife...."I'm going to kill you b**ch if you don't start listening to me woman"! the hands that like to get pulled over by Columbus Police and get multiple D.U.I.'s! The hands that like to put his family in jeopardy by playing games with the money, the hands that love to believe his "own hype", the hands that yanked his 2nd grade Daughter out of the school system with no intentions of allowing her to ever to return, the hands that loved to brainwash his child into thinking that "people like us don't do mental therapy"!
You placed all your "powers of choice" into the hands of someone like that! How dare you! How dare you place such an important thing like our relationship into the hands of your full blown NARCISSIST of a Father, and give him the final "say so" over everything that we worked so hard to build. How dare you give him the power to trash all my time, efforts, and money invested, I spent so much money and invested so much of my time just to get you out of Ohio and into Sacramento California, as so you could have a better life, as to help you make some of your life dreams come true, but the most important thing, I invested all that money, all that time, for what.........the most important thing.......was because I loved you! I wanted to see better for you, I wanted you to experience the world, I wanted you to be with me, not behind me, but to be by my side, walking hand in hand through this thing we call life. You and your Father flushed all that down the toilet. Your Father didn't get his way and throws his little hissy fit and decides, well if Aaron ain't going to fork over the monthly money he's now a walking liability, not an asset, so I can't have my Daughter with someone who a liability and someone who's not a "team player", better get her out of there and get her ready for the next guy she meets on-line!
Your sick, the both of you, your Father does nothing more than use his own Daughter as on-line bait, to try and hook "the big one", and when that "big one" is hooked, you make sure that the guy is hooked and hooked good. Even so far as allowing a person from 2000 miles away to sleep with your own Daughter on the very first night. Probably hoping and praying that she lay's on the female charm and screws my brains out and to "pussy whip" me onto that hook and whip my mind into submission! You a sick and twisted man for telling some people before I arrived in Ohio that his own Daughter hooked them a real "winner"! Support that statement by flashing my Facebook and my friends and family's Facebook pages to these people, telling them such things like "look at all they got, their loaded, they got coin, we better try some how to get in on that action"!
How dare the both of you waste my family's time and money, how dare you my dear in allowing my family to get close to you, get to like you and eventually to love you! How dare you allow my own Mother to invest $2800 of her own money into what she was lead to believe was going to be a "life long relationship"! How dare you make my Mother and Father start to think of you as a Daughter! How dare you get close to my friends, get all snuggly with them, make them think that your in it with me "for life"! How dare you hurt me!
How dare you in allowing me to think I was getting one thing, but you turned out to be another, nothing more than a "FIRST CLASS WHITE TRAILER PARK TRASH OF A GOLD DIGGER"! You and your family are nothing more than con artists, frauds, fakes, scam artists, traveling carnival doctors selling snake oils, master manipulators, master thief's, master liars, master of the art of delusions and smoke and mirrors, masters of self seeking ways, masters of pulling the wool over anyones eye's, master emotional abusers, master of using someone up for all their worth and spitting them out when their flavor runs out, master game players, the list could go on!
I know I am to blame for some of this, the "red flags" I choose to ignore, the warning signs I failed to pay attention to, the deep seeded listening of your guy's vocabulary and how you all put things, some of my answers were within the very first words spoken at the beginning. I decided to put all that aside and trust that things would work out, I trusted that once things really got started things would iron themselves out, I thought if I could get you far enough away from your parents that you could truly be that "free thinking" person you were selling to me that you were. I just want's to be!
Narcissist of a Father + Battered wife syndrome of a Mother = Sociopath in training for a Daughter!
Trailer park trash....
Double wide trailer mentality....
All you slutting yourselves out for the "quick buck".....
All of you have sold your souls to the Devil, f**king trash...............go whore yourselves out to the next poor guy who bites on the "my Daughter is juicy on-line bait" hook! May God have mercy on the next guy who lands on all your twisted hooks!
You all have sh*t for brains.....
Be gone!
How do these people do it? How do these people, some born and some taught to have deception in their hearts! How do these people get away with the smoke screens and the one trick pony shows? How does a person keep another person under their spell for slightly over 1.5 years? How does a person like that justify playing tricks and games and toying with another persons heart?
How can a person advertise who they are when courting them into a relationship and after the relationship is secure, how can that person "flick a switch" and change on a dime? How can someone who claimed to be "all that" go from "all that" to "all nothing"? How can a person when courting them, how can they sit there on Skype and with a straight face tell another person, like me, who's going into relations with them, how can they sit there and lie to me and tell me such things like "oh yeah, I'm my own person" and "I think for myself, I'm very independent" and "I do what I want" and "I do what I want, where I want and how I want"! Really.......Really.......oh yeah......Really!?!?!?!?!
So she was her "own thinker" and she was "so called" independent? Then why...oh why....did such a strong free thinking person give up all her powers of choice to her own Father? Why was it after I stopped the out flow of money to her parents months before the breakup, why didn't she speak up then? Why didn't she use her "so called" powers of choice and speak up right there and then and at least tell me "I'm a bad person for not wanting to help out her parents anymore"! Why? Why was it then after she started in the dark of the night, with cell phone in hand, why would she make her way out of the home, into the little park here on property and basically ask her Father what to do, and more importantly, listen to him!
You were a "so called" free thinker, you bragged about your ability to choose and plan things out for yourself, at least you did when we first had our relationship being perpetuated over such things like Skype and Facebook in the beginning. You liked to go off and tell me, face to face on our screens that you had your life under control, you got plans, you got it all figured out, you are your own person! Really? Then what was with the listening to your Father in the final stages of our engagement? What was up with listening to him ramble on and try to inject his "guilt trips" upon you after I stopped the out flow of the money? What was up with listening to your Father about the whole "I placed my hands upon the family cross, was hit with a powerful message from God, he told me that Aaron was bad news, Aaron was evil, Your Daughter needs to break it off and get away, and your Daughter needs to find a way home.......quickly!
So where was that "so called" free thinking? Where was your "so called" power of choice? Where was your "I am am my own person"? Where was your ability to "do as you want, when you want, how you want and where you want"? Where was the "so called" independent woman I fell in love with, where did that woman go, why did that woman in the end crumble into such a "Daddy's little girl"! Why did you give up on everything you claimed to hold so dear? Why was it now more important to listen to a person who was 2000 miles away vs. listening to me, listening to me when I would have said such things like "let's sit down and try and talk this out" or "let's sit down and try to have a understanding about all of this", but no, you even took my ability to request all that out of my hands, and placed those options into your greedy Fathers hands, the hands who like to get drunk all the time, the hands that like to pop morphine pills and rage, the hands that have time and time again hit your very own Mother, The hands that like to lie to such institutions such as S.S.I. and the V.A., lie to them to try to get more out of them! The hands that like to poke their finger up and into their 2nd grade Daughters private parts, the hands that like smack their Daughter around a little when they don't listen to him, the hands that like to pull hand guns into their Wife's face after good old fashion beat down, the hands that like to scream to his wife...."I'm going to kill you b**ch if you don't start listening to me woman"! the hands that like to get pulled over by Columbus Police and get multiple D.U.I.'s! The hands that like to put his family in jeopardy by playing games with the money, the hands that love to believe his "own hype", the hands that yanked his 2nd grade Daughter out of the school system with no intentions of allowing her to ever to return, the hands that loved to brainwash his child into thinking that "people like us don't do mental therapy"!
You placed all your "powers of choice" into the hands of someone like that! How dare you! How dare you place such an important thing like our relationship into the hands of your full blown NARCISSIST of a Father, and give him the final "say so" over everything that we worked so hard to build. How dare you give him the power to trash all my time, efforts, and money invested, I spent so much money and invested so much of my time just to get you out of Ohio and into Sacramento California, as so you could have a better life, as to help you make some of your life dreams come true, but the most important thing, I invested all that money, all that time, for what.........the most important thing.......was because I loved you! I wanted to see better for you, I wanted you to experience the world, I wanted you to be with me, not behind me, but to be by my side, walking hand in hand through this thing we call life. You and your Father flushed all that down the toilet. Your Father didn't get his way and throws his little hissy fit and decides, well if Aaron ain't going to fork over the monthly money he's now a walking liability, not an asset, so I can't have my Daughter with someone who a liability and someone who's not a "team player", better get her out of there and get her ready for the next guy she meets on-line!
Your sick, the both of you, your Father does nothing more than use his own Daughter as on-line bait, to try and hook "the big one", and when that "big one" is hooked, you make sure that the guy is hooked and hooked good. Even so far as allowing a person from 2000 miles away to sleep with your own Daughter on the very first night. Probably hoping and praying that she lay's on the female charm and screws my brains out and to "pussy whip" me onto that hook and whip my mind into submission! You a sick and twisted man for telling some people before I arrived in Ohio that his own Daughter hooked them a real "winner"! Support that statement by flashing my Facebook and my friends and family's Facebook pages to these people, telling them such things like "look at all they got, their loaded, they got coin, we better try some how to get in on that action"!
How dare the both of you waste my family's time and money, how dare you my dear in allowing my family to get close to you, get to like you and eventually to love you! How dare you allow my own Mother to invest $2800 of her own money into what she was lead to believe was going to be a "life long relationship"! How dare you make my Mother and Father start to think of you as a Daughter! How dare you get close to my friends, get all snuggly with them, make them think that your in it with me "for life"! How dare you hurt me!
How dare you in allowing me to think I was getting one thing, but you turned out to be another, nothing more than a "FIRST CLASS WHITE TRAILER PARK TRASH OF A GOLD DIGGER"! You and your family are nothing more than con artists, frauds, fakes, scam artists, traveling carnival doctors selling snake oils, master manipulators, master thief's, master liars, master of the art of delusions and smoke and mirrors, masters of self seeking ways, masters of pulling the wool over anyones eye's, master emotional abusers, master of using someone up for all their worth and spitting them out when their flavor runs out, master game players, the list could go on!
I know I am to blame for some of this, the "red flags" I choose to ignore, the warning signs I failed to pay attention to, the deep seeded listening of your guy's vocabulary and how you all put things, some of my answers were within the very first words spoken at the beginning. I decided to put all that aside and trust that things would work out, I trusted that once things really got started things would iron themselves out, I thought if I could get you far enough away from your parents that you could truly be that "free thinking" person you were selling to me that you were. I just want's to be!
Narcissist of a Father + Battered wife syndrome of a Mother = Sociopath in training for a Daughter!
Trailer park trash....
Double wide trailer mentality....
All you slutting yourselves out for the "quick buck".....
All of you have sold your souls to the Devil, f**king trash...............go whore yourselves out to the next poor guy who bites on the "my Daughter is juicy on-line bait" hook! May God have mercy on the next guy who lands on all your twisted hooks!
You all have sh*t for brains.....
Be gone!
Replies
Oh yeah, I\'ll add more here, seeing I still got things on my mind! Where do you get off starting up ma good old fashioned \"smear campaign\" about me shortly after arriving back to Ohio? I guess it just goes to prove the age, you get your feeling hurt, so you say, and you turn around and talk to members of our own on-line gaming group! As I purposely stayed away as to help decrease any drama my presence would generate, you, you on the other hand act like it\'s \"hunting season on Aaron\'s\"! Blabbing to this guy, rambling on to this guy, talking to this gal, all the story\'s you told them had huge amounts of \"spin\", you sure added a lot more to everything than what really happened. Your smear campaign was full of quick lies, telling people \"half truths\"! By the time I decided to come back it was to late, even after the group owner advised you to stop spreading sh*t around about me, you kept on going! Before I knew it, you\'d flooded the game group with some much bullsh*t that it made it hard for me to stay, after all my dear.....you were the victimized girl.............and I was labeled to be the bad old man, of course a gaming group with a population of approx. 80 men and 2 women are going to side with you, of course with your tears, and crying and \"poor pitiful me\" story\'s! Of course these hormonal guys are going to believe a foxy voice over their headphones.
Thanks for playing a major role in forcing my hand to resign my Administrators commission and give up my forum moderator powers and making me drop my in-game gamer tags! Thanks for turning people who once were my on-line friends, int people who now were questioning everything that came out of my mouth. You sure went out of your way to make sure by the time I felt it safe to return that I had one inhospitable environment to contend with. Even a month after I resigned and quit I heard a couple rumored reports where you were bragging to some members and taking credit for my fall from power and my fall from the group, you were taking so much pleasure in what you did, that some members called me and told me you were laughing about it. You have no morals, no values, no empathy, no sympathy, no understanding and sure as hell no remorse.
I sure hope you meet someone new in the group, oh wait, that\'s right, I hear you\'ve already got your next love interest all fired up and ready to go! Maybe this person, a guy I know, maybe he can treat you like I once did, all caring about your emotional needs, and I hope he is a nice guy to you like I once was. Remember the day\'s? In the beginning? Remember one night you slipped into my Team Speak channel and hinted to the fact that you\'ve got some problems and no one was willing to jump into a private channel and talk to you about it? Remember I was the only group member that said \"sure I\'ll talk to you\"? Remember me slipping into a private channel, brining you in, and locking the channel as so to make it private? Remember day after day, week after week, month after month we would just sit inside the private channel and talk, I\'d help you with your family issues, you\'d help me with some of my stuff, we\'d play on-line games like a version of Uno?
I sure hope this new guy you got is as sympathetic to the plight of your emotional needs as I was. 3-4 months of my time wasted on trying to help you, there I was trying my best to help life you up and what do you do to me shortly before and shortly there after our relationship end? You drag me down! Doesn\'t sound to fair now does it? I lift you up, you drag me down! Oh well, I hear that about sociopaths and spectrum disordered people, when they stop getting showed with affection, attention and gift and thrills and frills, or at best all the showering slows down, you guys get mad because you think your not getting all your \"entitled\" to! So you prepare to jump ship, but there again you didn\'t jump ship all on your own, you had your dear old Daddy, the cross touching Dad to help you as well.
Because of you I\'m littered with \"after the fact\' emotional issues! because of you I got this hole in my heart! Because of you I had to check myself into a mental hospital all the while to keep myself from blowing my brains out! Because of you I now live alone! Because of you I\'m tortured by memory\'s and visual reminders of you just about everywhere i go! Because of you I had to do \"damage control\" and apologize to the people you hurt and left behind, I had to apologize to them for bringing a person like you into their lives! Because of you I had to drop out of my former on-line gaming group, give up Team Speak, give up Call of Duty 4, give up my Administratorship and my memberships! After all I had to give up, you, you on the other hand can do nothing but \"laugh\" at what you\'ve been able to accomplish! I suffer and you laugh, I get heart broken and you laugh, I drop out of the gaming group and you laugh, I have to go around making amends to the people you hurt and left behind and you laugh! I now live alone while you enjoy the company of your dear old Mommy & Daddy, I\'m alone and you laugh!
After all I did for you, after all my family did for you, after all my friends did for you....................after all we did, you just laugh!
Your pathetic!