just a blah morning
I couldnt sleep at all last night. I tossed and turned and then i would wake back up. I kept thinking about my NTS tomorrow and that always makes me think of Ashton which made me think of his father and I just get so mad. Its been 8 years but he doesnt have a clue what he missed out on. I just want to be like you had an amazing son and you should miss him like I do! I also start thinking about everything else and the guilt sets in and its just a hot mess. As you guys know I have been so cared this whole pregnancy and while I do beleive this is an establishd pregnancy and i will not m/c i am not convinced everything is ok wth the baby. I hope after tomorrow when i get the scan and test results from my blood work that my mind will finally be at ease. Of course I will always worry about something but maybe not to this extreem anymore. Dh gets home from work about 6:30 7ish pm. tonight and has 2 days of. THANK YOU LORD. Its been a really rough 9 days with him working so much. Im exhasted and just want a break. I think his mom is coming out one day next week and that is good because then i wll get a break also. We leave for cali on the 15th of July. We fly drom DC to Atlanta to drop off Dede (my fur baby) on teh 14th. Then leave the 15th to fly to LAX. Not looking forward to flying 51/2 hours with Ian. the 1 1/2 to atlanta is hard. But james will be with me which is good because ive been by myself the other 2 times. im looking forward to seeing everyone. I have no idea when the next time will be be as we will have 2 kids and james is saving all his time off after this trip fo when i have the baby. It expensive to fly and rent a car.
We have a pool play date today so that will be fun. It will hopefully wear Ian out enough so that he will take a good nap thn be up about 2 1/2 hours bfore his dad gets home.
I am surprised daily by Ian. He is so smart and funny. I cant beleive how an 18 month old can ave THAT MUCH personality. seriously. I keep going back and forth about a toddler bed. DH is convinced it wont work and he will stay up all night playing. I told him that we all lear to sleep in a regular bed at some point. He is such a crazy sleeper also moving so much im scared he will fall out even with a border up. I have decided we will get a new crib for this baby. I hate Ians crib. Its a drop down and stoped dropping down and is a PITA. Besides they are not safe anymore so its a good excuse.
I have a horrible headache. I woke up with it at some point last night and it hasnt gone away. Fun fun. Ian is still a grump with his molars popping up. I feel so bad. This morning he was drinking his milk and i asked how he felt and he pointed to his cheek.
Im have also been thinking about Kara. I pray that her little girl is ok and that she is ok and recovers soon. I can only imagine how scared she is and then I think about that and how if that was me i would probably be all alone because DH would be out of town. Im not planning on him getting a ground base assignment until im about 39 weeks. his office is 20 minutes from home. But they are getting a new boss so Im hoping he will be good about it and understand. im such a worrier. I wish i wasnt but i am. Well im going to get Ian his breakfast. Have a good das ladies.
We have a pool play date today so that will be fun. It will hopefully wear Ian out enough so that he will take a good nap thn be up about 2 1/2 hours bfore his dad gets home.
I am surprised daily by Ian. He is so smart and funny. I cant beleive how an 18 month old can ave THAT MUCH personality. seriously. I keep going back and forth about a toddler bed. DH is convinced it wont work and he will stay up all night playing. I told him that we all lear to sleep in a regular bed at some point. He is such a crazy sleeper also moving so much im scared he will fall out even with a border up. I have decided we will get a new crib for this baby. I hate Ians crib. Its a drop down and stoped dropping down and is a PITA. Besides they are not safe anymore so its a good excuse.
I have a horrible headache. I woke up with it at some point last night and it hasnt gone away. Fun fun. Ian is still a grump with his molars popping up. I feel so bad. This morning he was drinking his milk and i asked how he felt and he pointed to his cheek.
Im have also been thinking about Kara. I pray that her little girl is ok and that she is ok and recovers soon. I can only imagine how scared she is and then I think about that and how if that was me i would probably be all alone because DH would be out of town. Im not planning on him getting a ground base assignment until im about 39 weeks. his office is 20 minutes from home. But they are getting a new boss so Im hoping he will be good about it and understand. im such a worrier. I wish i wasnt but i am. Well im going to get Ian his breakfast. Have a good das ladies.
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