January 31st: Anniversary of Brother's "Death Day": What to do?
As I know he'll be "tugging" at me, at my heart, from the Other Side, telling me "remember me!", want to do something in honor of his spectacular life. Hmmm...ideas? Something car-racing themed...no racetracks around here...maybe capture some old movies of him racing his Chevelle at Moroso speedway...? Maybe me racing my bicycle as fast as I can pedal, knowing he'll love the speed...?
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I think putting some old movies on a DVD would be nice. Is he buried nearby -if so, pay him a visit? Any mutual friends nearby? Send the DVD to friends and family as remembrance?
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my mom in 2005; I miss her terribly. She\'s buried in another state, so I can\'t visit too often. I feel a similar \"tug\", so I know what you mean. She liked flowers, so on the anniversary of her death, I get a nice bouquet, set them by her picture, light a candle and \"talk\" to her. I find it very comforting.
Thanks, Zafira. Yeah, more DVDs are in the works. Two more visits to Moroso Super Chevy weekend back in the late \'90s to edit and put on DVD. He loved racing his car!
At his wish, he was cremated. I held onto a baggie of a portion of his ashes for a long time, then, finally, \"buried\" him around our pool deck, where he liked to lay out in the sun. I think I\'ll lay out today and talk to him! My dad and I performed a \"burial at sea\", dumping another baggie of my brother into the Atlantic ocean just off Deerfield Beach, per my brother\'s wish. My dad\'s got a bigger baggie of him that he\'d like to take up to Buckingham Park, Colorado, where we used to like to go in the \'70s as kids, with our parents, and have a picnic next to the stream. Tough to think of my brother in a baggie (sob).
in my culture, as in many others, it is customary to get together on the day of passing with friends and family who knew and loved the person and basically have dinner, drinks and talk about this person. It is amazing how many fun moments come up. We usually set a plate for the dead either at home and/or on their grave with some bread and a shot.
I know the feeling - my Mom was cremated also (as was her wish); the container is buried in a cemetary, and she has a lovely marker with roses on it. But, still, it hard to grasp that that\'s what\'s left of her. Thank God I didn\'t see the body - my last memory of her was when she was alive, which is also comforting to me.
This might seem a little boring, but you can have a mass sayed for him, or get together some friends and pray the rosary for him. (Just what I would do)
Thanks, folks!!! My dad and I ate lunch at Olive Garden, which we always did with my brother. Seemed appropriate. Three bowls of soup, salad and breadsticks in his honor! We talked a bit about him, his strengths and his foibles, and about the meaning of life in general. Only consensus we could come up with is we\'re here to try and make our relationships, with each other and with the planet, function. Hello-!
You probably already did this, but think of something that you did together that made you both laugh.
Thanks, mws. Does rating my farts count? That\'s something we always used to do. Rate them by sound and smell.
How about buying toy trucks and cars, then donating them to a children\'s service? You could buy some throughout the year, then donate them at Christmas? Oh, yeah, the fart thing sounds very funny!