its not always a great life but its mine from the journal of losinghopeelly
Its not always a great life but its mine Wednesday, February 29, 2012
I have struggled so much with different things illness, pain, and even depression. While it seems like lately its always been something bad happening in one way or another I know things will get better. I have already started on the path towards getting myself healthy once and for all. Every day I am one step closer to surgery and every day I am one step closer to being the me that I have inside. I can't wait for the energy that everyone seems to acquire after surgery to hit me. Don't know if my husband and son will be able to handle that but they will have to learn. Since I have made the decision to have this surgery I have made some great changes in my life. I'm not a big eater but don't always make the best choices. Generally speaking I don't eat breakfast, sometimes I eat lunch on those days if I do eat anything it is something I can pop in the microwave or eat cold. Dinner time is my big meal usually especially when my husband is home. Dinner usually is some sort of meat, a vegetable, some sort of potato and bread or pasta. Sometimes dinner or lunch is what I can grab at the drive thru. I have drank anywhere from 2-4 liters of soda a day. Since I made the decision though I have stopped drinking the soda. Had one the other day when we went out to eat and didn't like it. I have found that I don't really like it. I am craving water once again and its a wonderful feeling to crave something that is good for me. I've started using protein drinks and at first thought it tasted way to sweet so I thought I had a ton of sugar in it. After re-reading the label I saw it had only one gram of sugar. Being diabetic I am supposed to be eating a high protein diet in the first place so I am really getting myself to a better place. It used to be that if I was craving a snack I would reach for some chips or buttered popcorn. The last month my day goes Breakfast: protein drink, Lunch: protein drink, Dinner: usually something like a chef salad or something with a little meat and a lot of veggies trying to stay away from the starches as much as I can. My blood sugar numbers are starting to go down and are reacting like normal to food which feels good. However, it also feels weird because my body has been operating at a non-normal blood sugar for so long so its hard to get past the shaky feeling even though my numbers are like 115-120 which is good. I'm glad I am making the choices I am making now because they are only going to improve my life. When I finally get the surgery its going to be great. I talked with my counselor today and we are aware of the issues that some people face and we will work through them as they come up. I'm actually consuming more now than I did before and yet my calorie intake is not that grand. I can't wait.
I have struggled so much with different things illness, pain, and even depression. While it seems like lately its always been something bad happening in one way or another I know things will get better. I have already started on the path towards getting myself healthy once and for all. Every day I am one step closer to surgery and every day I am one step closer to being the me that I have inside. I can't wait for the energy that everyone seems to acquire after surgery to hit me. Don't know if my husband and son will be able to handle that but they will have to learn. Since I have made the decision to have this surgery I have made some great changes in my life. I'm not a big eater but don't always make the best choices. Generally speaking I don't eat breakfast, sometimes I eat lunch on those days if I do eat anything it is something I can pop in the microwave or eat cold. Dinner time is my big meal usually especially when my husband is home. Dinner usually is some sort of meat, a vegetable, some sort of potato and bread or pasta. Sometimes dinner or lunch is what I can grab at the drive thru. I have drank anywhere from 2-4 liters of soda a day. Since I made the decision though I have stopped drinking the soda. Had one the other day when we went out to eat and didn't like it. I have found that I don't really like it. I am craving water once again and its a wonderful feeling to crave something that is good for me. I've started using protein drinks and at first thought it tasted way to sweet so I thought I had a ton of sugar in it. After re-reading the label I saw it had only one gram of sugar. Being diabetic I am supposed to be eating a high protein diet in the first place so I am really getting myself to a better place. It used to be that if I was craving a snack I would reach for some chips or buttered popcorn. The last month my day goes Breakfast: protein drink, Lunch: protein drink, Dinner: usually something like a chef salad or something with a little meat and a lot of veggies trying to stay away from the starches as much as I can. My blood sugar numbers are starting to go down and are reacting like normal to food which feels good. However, it also feels weird because my body has been operating at a non-normal blood sugar for so long so its hard to get past the shaky feeling even though my numbers are like 115-120 which is good. I'm glad I am making the choices I am making now because they are only going to improve my life. When I finally get the surgery its going to be great. I talked with my counselor today and we are aware of the issues that some people face and we will work through them as they come up. I'm actually consuming more now than I did before and yet my calorie intake is not that grand. I can't wait.
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