its been a while

instead of posting, i respond to those who need help, i dont journal alot anymore, i dont think - NO OFFENSE, anyone on here diverted me ever from gambling, its the truth, i read/write/listen/and heed the advice, but dont take it, i know we need each other to feel like we have a bond, and its good to think we are in this together, but for me, recovery ...............real recovery...................comes from within and the fight is a solo one at the end of the day
we all have the ability to get over this, but its at our own pace and through our own methods of insanity that we learn to finally make that decision
stopping cant be taught, your full existence in misery has to find the strength to recover - to finally make the decision no more
i have not been an angel, i thought i had this shit beat, i toned it down, i went less, i bet less, i only did this or that, doesnt matter, i truly hate looking or being scared to look at my checking account, there is so much more to life than this bullshit, so safe to say - i havent gambled in a while and hope to god the days pass and life goes on without a thought about it, some day, i'll get there.