It's Offical

It's offical I'm deppressed again, not like I was ever really better. I've learned to push all the negative aside or deep down but its been getting harder every day and more recently harder every hour. Now I'm up at 2 am unable to shut down.  There is so much that I need closure on but I am denied this due to others invovled and myself.  I typically fake it till I make it but this time it isnt working.  Everything is bad. My whole life had been bad. I know no matter what has happened I made a choice and now I choose to stall my own life but I also believe that I am owed closure on so many situations.  I don't want their lifes to be turned inside out no good will come from that I just want validation.  I want them to sincerley know how much pain they have caused me.  I know none of the people involved care.. None of them will allow me the their sincere appologies...None of them are affected like me.