It's not me
In my last journal I wrote that I didn't handle a situation very well with T. Sometimes I forget that he's still using and that this "over reaction" by him is , not how I respond to a situation with him, but rather it's because he's not right. Since things are much better on the surface, I almost forget that things are "normal".
Yesterday I really took it to heart. I took the blame - like I used to in the past. Yesterday he made a mountain out of a mole hill (complaining "there's nothing to eat". We don't have enough junk food and it made him mad. And because it happened so fast - I blamed myself for not responding in the appropriate manner. After he left I thought "Gee - I should have insisted he sit down and relax so that I could get him something to eat". I should have done this - or that. What?
So - this morning - still bothered about it - I looked at his cell phone report on-line because I suppose I just wanted to make sure it wasn't me. It isn't. The other day he left his cell home so I peak at his address book and then looked up on line to see who he's has been calling. One alias's name is "Crack Rock". I saw on his texting that this guy is a seller. Seller of what - not sure. I don't believe T is involved with heavy stuff at all - but he is involved with a seller and the calls went back and forth last night. So it's not me.
Yesterday I really took it to heart. I took the blame - like I used to in the past. Yesterday he made a mountain out of a mole hill (complaining "there's nothing to eat". We don't have enough junk food and it made him mad. And because it happened so fast - I blamed myself for not responding in the appropriate manner. After he left I thought "Gee - I should have insisted he sit down and relax so that I could get him something to eat". I should have done this - or that. What?
So - this morning - still bothered about it - I looked at his cell phone report on-line because I suppose I just wanted to make sure it wasn't me. It isn't. The other day he left his cell home so I peak at his address book and then looked up on line to see who he's has been calling. One alias's name is "Crack Rock". I saw on his texting that this guy is a seller. Seller of what - not sure. I don't believe T is involved with heavy stuff at all - but he is involved with a seller and the calls went back and forth last night. So it's not me.
Replies
oh:((....this must be so hard to keep on top of, to keep up a certain \'attitude\' that is meant to be best for him, but all your tumultuous emotions naturally being held in check. Hang on in there, I do so hope that he is not involved - here is hoping your instinct that he isnt is RIGHT> Temptations are bound to be here there and everywhere, but it seems he can DO it.....despite these temptations...take care..hugs CAthrynnXXXX