It's Just Too Much
Dear Journal,
Today is not going so well. I'm having a severe anxiety attack because I feel like everything is falling apart right now. My finances got me feeling super depressed. I've been laid off since February. I've been doing some small side jobs, and now I'm at the end of the road in terms of my reserved funds. They are completely depleted. My heart is racing right now. My mind is racing. I can't focus on much because I'm so concerned about my livelihood. What is going to happen? There is no help in sight! I feel like I've been there for so many people & helped them in tough situations, but when I need someone, where is my help? What happens when the help needs help? I know that I'm viewed as a very independent & strong person, but sometimes, it's too much for me. My cross is too heavy for me. The burden is too much & there is too much on my plate! Where is my God? Have I been deserted & nobody sent me a memo? I've slept for about 4 hours at best & I just want to go to sleep, so I don't have to think about everything I'm dealing with right now.
Until next time Journal,
MsPoeticJM
Today is not going so well. I'm having a severe anxiety attack because I feel like everything is falling apart right now. My finances got me feeling super depressed. I've been laid off since February. I've been doing some small side jobs, and now I'm at the end of the road in terms of my reserved funds. They are completely depleted. My heart is racing right now. My mind is racing. I can't focus on much because I'm so concerned about my livelihood. What is going to happen? There is no help in sight! I feel like I've been there for so many people & helped them in tough situations, but when I need someone, where is my help? What happens when the help needs help? I know that I'm viewed as a very independent & strong person, but sometimes, it's too much for me. My cross is too heavy for me. The burden is too much & there is too much on my plate! Where is my God? Have I been deserted & nobody sent me a memo? I've slept for about 4 hours at best & I just want to go to sleep, so I don't have to think about everything I'm dealing with right now.
Until next time Journal,
MsPoeticJM
Replies
Hi, I am so in the same boat and you have taken the words right out of my mouth. Why can\'t life just be a bit easier. We are here to support eachother. Know you are not alone.
Hi! Yeah, I know & now, it has gotten worse. I\'m going to be homeless! I gotta move out by Sunday. This entry is a little old. Smh!
How are you, though?
Hi MsPoetic! I have been down that road before. I thought I was going to end up homeless on the streets. If you rent maybe think about moving in with someone, perhaps a family member or a trusted friend? Just till you get back on your feet. If you own your place, perhaps get a room mate to help ease some of the financial strain? Just some ideas.
I was renting at the time I fell out of work because of health issues. And to make matters worse, the military canceled my medical retirement (and all the benefits) right around that time. I called my landlord and explained the situation to him. I thought he was going to kick me out because I was out of money and broke. Was getting a little bit of disability from the VA and that was it but not enough to live on. Later that month he called me back and told me he decided to lower the rent for me! I couldn\'t believe it! What a nice guy!
I just realized this is from June. I hope you have found a place to stay either with a friend or family. Will pray for you! Let us know what happens! Hugs....