It's beginning to look a lot ...

The holidays are almost here.  I can tell by the creeping guilt I feel climbing into my reality.  I love my family but I don't want to spend time with them.  That makes me feel guilty.  Then ... when the awareness sinks in that, without them, I'm 100% completely alone ... I feel sad.  Guilty or sad ... guilty or sad ... what will my holidays hold this year?  Ahhh... come on January!  It can't get here soon enough!!!