It's a matter of time.....
Okay - now that my husband are closer to being on the same page than we ever have been - now the real test for both of us --- can we follow through on this? We know how stubborn our son is - we know that he probably will choose to leave than to accept help. I also know he will come back. I believe he will break in. Knowing how he is -- I anticipate something like that. But the main worry I have is him choosing to leave and being out on his own - especially this winter. Yes - I am told that these people can be very resilient. A facilitator in our former support group was a recovering addict and she reassured us of that.
I don't want to project too much but I do need to be prepared and a realist that this isn't going to be easy. What has been particularly difficult is that I'm not angry with T - just hurt. It would be easier if I were angry.
My husband was so happy when T apologized to him via text - about taking the money - promising him that he'll get a job to pay him back. Didn't want to burst his bubble but even if there was some element of remorse - I feel like it is more about manipulating. Shortly after that, thinking he's earned himself back into our graces, he asked me for money and later - if he could borrow my laptop. At this point I don't think he'll take my computer but I don't want to take any chances.
And then - he asks me (via text) - I told him no. He wanted to know why - I told him because we cannot trust him right now and that he'll have to earn it back. I told him that we love him and that he needs help. No comment. He did comment on my "no" however and called me a bitch. I told him that that hurt my feelings especially since it was because he didn't get his own way.
I know he's ill and his brain isn't well but - it still hurts.
I don't want to project too much but I do need to be prepared and a realist that this isn't going to be easy. What has been particularly difficult is that I'm not angry with T - just hurt. It would be easier if I were angry.
My husband was so happy when T apologized to him via text - about taking the money - promising him that he'll get a job to pay him back. Didn't want to burst his bubble but even if there was some element of remorse - I feel like it is more about manipulating. Shortly after that, thinking he's earned himself back into our graces, he asked me for money and later - if he could borrow my laptop. At this point I don't think he'll take my computer but I don't want to take any chances.
And then - he asks me (via text) - I told him no. He wanted to know why - I told him because we cannot trust him right now and that he'll have to earn it back. I told him that we love him and that he needs help. No comment. He did comment on my "no" however and called me a bitch. I told him that that hurt my feelings especially since it was because he didn't get his own way.
I know he's ill and his brain isn't well but - it still hurts.
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