It\'s a bitter world for me.

Growing up I was the fat kid.  My parents divorced when I was 3 and my dad died when I was 13.   I was depressed even as a kid and eventually turned to drugs throughout highschool.  I had two ectopic pregnancies (tubal pregnancies) and both of these pregnancies were unplanned but the babies were so loved and wanted.  I came very close to death BOTH times and to save my life my babies had to be sacrificed and my tubes ruptured and removed.  I was bleeding from the inside out and the pain was so great.  I've not yet come to terms with my infertility and I'm still greiving the loss of my children, the loss of my womanhood, the loss of all my dreams of having children and the loss of my happiness and life forever more.