Is This a Good Sign ?????
Today when My Niece Bridgette came by to help Me out... to take My Garbage out, and get My Mail for Me... in My Mail, One of the Items was a " Change of Address " Notice that My Exbf will from now on have His Mail Forwarded to His NEW Address Per the Request He put through. In Times Past, during the MANY Other Times that He had left Me for Other Women, when this Notice would come it would tear Me Apart... Literally ! I would fall apart, and be Crying, and completely wallowing in Misery, and Sadness, for at least the rest of the Entire Day that it came in the Mail - if not maybe even for the Next Couple of Days, as well. It would also stir feelings of wanting Him Back, and Missing Him terribly ! BUT... THIS TIME... it was Completely Different ! My Niece passed Me my Mail, and I felt NOTHING when I saw the " Change of Address " Notice. NOTHING AT ALL !!!! I didn't feel UPSET in ANY WAY, and honestly could care less about it ! It surprised Me, but at the same time I'm thinking it's GOT TO BE A GOOD SIGN, RIGHT ???! I mean, to feel NOTHING about it, has to mean that I'm making some Good Progress as far as Healing from being in the EXTREMELY TOXIC Relationship with Him for so long.The Fact that it didn't so much as even make Me start Missing Him again, was the Part that surprised Me the most about it, I think. Maybe I'm Stronger than I intially thought I'd be This Time, about His Leaving Me Again !??! You think that could be it ??? It's got to be. If not, then I'd be Crying My Eyes out right now, and I'm DEFINITELY THANKFUL that I'm NOT doing that !!!! IN FACT... ACTUALLY TO SAY THAT I FELT ' NOTHING ' WHEN SEEING THE ' CHANGE OF ADDRESS ' NOTICE, WASN'T COMPLETELY 100 % CORRECT.... Because Now, that I really sit back and think about it, I believe I actually SMILED when I saw what it was. To a Degree, I'd go as far to say that seeing it made Me somewhat HAPPY ! Maybe it's because it's sort of Extra Closure to a Chapter of My Life that I know I DO NOT WANT TO HAPPEN AGAIN !!!! EVER !!!! Now I've just got to REMEMBER to AVOID talking to Him AT ALL COSTS !!!! I say that, because I have a gut feeling that His " sudden Niceness " has got to be a Sign that He's thinking He's on the Verge of being KICKED OUT from where He is, at least eventually, and He's ALREADY trying to CON HIS WAY BACK INTO MY LIFE AGAIN !!!! THE ASS !!!! LOL HE'S SO STUPID... IF HE ACTUALLY THINKS THAT I'LL FALL FOR ALL OF HIS B.S... YET AGAIN ! I've heard it ALL too many Times from Him to know that it's ALL LIES... JUST LIES !!!! WHY ELSE would He make a Point to Tell Me that He's ALREADY been having a few Major Fights with His NEW GF, unless He's trying to lay ground work for getting Back with Me AGAIN ! BUT... ONE THING about that Conversation was VERY DIFFERENT this Time.... I told Him Very Bluntly, that His NEW GF has NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, because I'm NOT trying to get You Back ! Pointing this out to Him, I think sunk in a little bit, because He got quiet for a moment, and changed the subject very quickly. He always does that when He's trying to avoid talking about something. In Fact, during the Last Couple of Times HE had Called Me, I reminded Him that there's NO WAY that I'm EVER going to Take Him Back ! I told Him that I Hope He'll be happy for YEARS AND YEARS to come with His New GF ! LOL Well... So I guess as far as " Healing " goes, I'm doing pretty good so far.I still have Some Days that are not so good.... BUT on the Positive Side, then I have a Day like Today when I'm feeling Very Strong, and Confident that My EXBF's Leaving Me was a GREAT THING in fact... and the BEST THING for Me !