Is it just me??
I really want to know why is it so hard for me to find a girl who is right for me? I always over think things like I am not good looking thats why nobody likes me, or maybe I have a bad attitude and people see how fustrated I am some times, but honestly I am a respectable guy I think. I am always out helping people in class, Or maybe is it my past drug problem...do people really hold that on someone for life? I mean I know I was a bad addict at one point but don't people deserve a second chance? I understand how no one can trust me anymore because I can't even trust myself, I realize I was a drug addict, but I have changed...for the better. I only smoke weed now and as of latley I haven't even been doing that a lot. I feel like I am healthier and happier than ever when it comes to my health and mind, but I don't understand why I can't make friends anymore. I have shut out all my old friends because they are still into drugs and they are severly heading down the wrong path and I just couldn't sit back and watch them fall, I told them that I was no longer interested in doing drugs anymore and they looked at me as though I was crazy. Like what I have choosen to do what so wrong and I actually felt a little hurt that they couldn't respect my desisions. So now I am all by myself, have been for quite sometime now. All I do is train for football and track all the time and do all my schoolwork like I never have before I swear I turned over a new leaf and I really just want people to see that. I have come to the conclusion that I can't find a decent girlfriend because of they way I look or dress. I am just so sick of being alone I want someone there who can just understand with me. Is so hard sometimes but I just look outside my window at the thunderstroms and hope things get better soon, but my heart still hurts right now :/