Infinite happiness

Here I am. I wish myself love. I wish myself happiness. I wish myself peace. I wish myself as one. 
Can I exist on here as one? Will I always be two. I wish for the day that I will be one. Just me. I like me. 
When I become me I will disappear. I will be me. 
It is so clear but hard to focus. The harder I try the harder I becomes. I laugh. Spaces inbetween words is where I live. 
How do I exist without words? How do I exist without you? What it would feel like to be the river. How nice it would be to flow. Flow without flowing. Be without being. 
Here I am. In this perfect state. I am happy. I am calm. Sometimes. I am in mind but not of mind. I am in world but not of world. I am in spirit but not of spirit. 
I speak the answer but I am the question. Without the question there would be no answer. Without an answer there would be no question. There would just be. Oh how wonderful it would be to be. Trying to be is so much harder then just being. If only I knew how to be.
I am always being. That is the answer but I am the question.
Every question has an answer. Every answer has a question. What would it feel like to just fade away. See a rainbow, be a rainbow. To be the mirror seeing the reflection. To be the reflection seeing the mirror. To be the mirror and the reflection. For both to fade away.
Oh what a day that would be. I could be I instead of trying to be me.
If I could fade away.