In a Nutshell
Is it a bad thing when you seek counseling for emotional issues and the "therapist" starts obsessing about your weight? I'll be 29 at the end of September and I've been trying to deal with anxiety, depression, anger, feeling socially inept (among other things) and trying to lose weight. I've been to see numerous counselors and have tried several anti-depressant type medications with little success. And after I moved to another country to be with my husband, I decided I should seek counseling again. I went through an intake interview followed by an interview with a psychologist and finally got to see a counselor after several months. Shortly after my first appointment with her, she went on medical leave for several months. In that time I started to come to term with a few things but I was and am still having trouble with some of my more social related issues. She finally comes back and I have an appointment with her. Somehow my wanting help with the emotional aspects has turned into her being all excited about getting me to lose weight by keeping a food diary and counting calories. I don't like doing food diaries, they don't work for me. Seeing that I'm not eating a lot of food but making less healthy choices is not news to me. I know I have trouble with sugar and cheese, some other fatty foods. Seeing it on paper doesn't change anything for me. What it does is piss me off because I spend more time writing down what I'm eating and calculating the serving size, calories, fat, etc. and not getting out and doing anything. I put my husband on hold, my pets get ignored, things don't get done because I'm sitting here trying to figure out what 30 grams is in cups or tablespoons and if the serving size is 1 cup then how many calories is there in just a few tablespoons and other fun mathematical food problems. Personally, I thought the whole idea here was to get me off my ass, not keep me on it trying to calculate my nutritional habits. Let's also keep in mind I was seeing a dietitican and my therapist is not one of those, so I'm not really sure what qualifies her to tell me what I should and shouldn't do nutrition-wise, especially when the dietitican told me my problem is EMOTIONAL! Yeah, so basically I'm still going to be screaming and freaking out at random, but I'll be a little thinner as I do it. How is this helping me? And of course, now I'm wondering if I should even be in therapy since I had recently taken an Interviewing & Counseling course when I was enrolled in University. I'm not saying that taking the course replaces therapy, but I learned some techniques that I applied to myself and have been able to see things more clearly. I'm just not sure how to fix the causes of certain problems. And having taken the course, I can identify the techniques my counselor is using, and she's using way too much self-disclosure. Seriously, I know more about her than she knows about me because she does most of the talking. I know she has issues with her own weight, so I'm beginning to wonder if she's not projecting that onto me to some extent. I'm just not sure what to do about this though, because if I decide not to go back for my next session, she'll want to know why. If I talk to someone else about her, there is a chance she could get fired. Well, maybe not. I don't know. A friend of mine told me she went for counseling and had a similar experience which resulted in that particular counselor losing her job. Anything is possible I guess. Decisions like this is where part of the anxiety and emotional crap comes from. I have difficulties dealing with things like this, and somehow, I'm pretty sure losing 5 pounds or even 50 pounds is not going to change that. I'm just kind of lost right now. But, I'm thinking maybe I should talk to my aunt. She's a psychologist who teaches at a University so maybe she could help me figure out what to do about this situation? She's too close for therapy, but she generally gives good advice about how to deal with people. Its got to be better than driving myself nuts about this whole thing, right?