In a Dream

I'm dying I'm dying from the inside out.
I wake up everyday thinking that today is going to be different, today I won't hurt, today I won't think and cry. I feel like someone has ripped out my heart an put a boulder in it's place. I have to pull myself back into reality before I walk outside of my bedroom door because I believe that I'm going to see my mom sitting in her spot waiting for me to get up.
It hurts it hurts everyday and nobody knows how much it hurts.
When and why won't it stop?!