im so so sad today

im so depressed today,i brke down and text him this morning and he rang me but he was awful to me.he said to stop contacting him as i am not letting us get over this,i cried so much on the phone but he just said to stop making him feel guilty.why is it all my fault when i never asked for any of this and i cant help but still love him.oh i wish i didnt it would be so much easier.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Hey..Nix Whose controlling your feelings? Re-read your note. You- texed him. Your wasting your time. He doesn\'t care! Believe it! He has other fish to fry.

My best advise get a lawyer and get support and make him pay and go for everything. figure out your budget and what you need and the kids need. As they grow they need things like dance lessons, soccer and allowances and a decent place to live. don\'t budget yourself for the necessities only. He broke a contract with you and you are claiming damages etc. That\'s how the legal system works. In Canada. If he gives you lump sum money instead of alimony you don\'t have to claim it on taxes until it earns interest.

Yes, your life is going to change..It will be hard. But you will survive and be stronger and a more determined person.

Another thing ok you need to support yourself. He should help pay you to go back to school and he should had time with the kids. don\'t worry about where they are going and with whom they may have to associate with. they are your kids and they are smart. they will ask the right questions. He\'s living the easy life make it hard. Nasty yes, but it is the truth.
nix192
nix192

thanks 2ndstrike,you have so many kind words whenever i need them.you are so right,it is always me that texts him first etc.well not any more,even though its going to be very hard ive got to let go and move on.if that means seeing a lawyer then perhaps thats what i need to push me into starting to get over it.many thanks again.xx
hurtinandhealin2560
hurtinandhealin2560

I understand the desire to contact the stbx--I remember so well \"creating\" reasons to call--and then he would be mean to me and I would cry and feel worse. No contact is the way to go. I finally had to establish it to keep my sanity.

I know you love him, but he\'s made it clear that he is moving on. Listen to 2ndstrike--time to lawyer up.

Sending healing hugs.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I understand....it\'s hard to let go. It will eventually happen.....it\'s a long, painful process, but will happen. I can\'t stand my ex so it\'s easy to not want to have contact with him, however, we do have children together. Since they are not little anymore, it helps that they can just contact them if they need to. That helps me out. Keep writing in the journal, that may be of help to you to express your feelings. Take Care.