I have been on my own since 1998. I went through recovery on my own and succeeded on my own. It is true that I sought the help of a recovery program but save for checking in with my mentor I was on my own.
So now that we\'ve crossed paths before and you\'ve relapsed, I have a few questions for you to consider:
1) Did you make an air tight schedulw where every minute was accounted for?
2) Have you made contingency plans to address the triggers and idle times?
3) In times of temptation have you removed yourself from any possible venues where you know you may give in? If not, why?
4) Have you filled your mind and time in the pursuit of positive thinking, listened to helpful audiobooks, sermons, read inspirational books.
5) Do you understand that this is a process, that rebooting your brain requires consistent positive behavior and persistent avoidance of addictive behavior? It took me 2 years to feel slightly back to original factory settings, that is before porn
6) Have you been living the life of someone who is not addicted?
7) Why are you having problems keeping your word to yourself? Next time you say it is the last time, make sure it IS the LAST TIME. Every time you relapse it is detrimental to your psyche. It turns into an endless cycle that ends up hurting you in ways you will only notice when it is already too late.
The gist of my post is this, truthfully there is no reason read excuse to continue on this path. For me, it boiled down to that, if my behavior had no reason for being and was only hurting me, I had to stop it. There was no room for negotiation here.
You call it a fetish, I call it addictive behavior that has found a preference. So, as such, it can be rectified. All behavior can be rectified. All it needs is persistence and consistency.
Look for what caused the relapse and correct it. And promise yourself that since you deserve better, you will treat yourself better. And God cannot do his good work if you keep taking control every time. I had to simply let go and let God. I suggest you do the same.
Hope this helps,
Wolf (sober for almost 5 years) \"
Replies
I have been on my own since 1998. I went through recovery on my own and succeeded on my own. It is true that I sought the help of a recovery program but save for checking in with my mentor I was on my own.
So now that we\'ve crossed paths before and you\'ve relapsed, I have a few questions for you to consider:
1) Did you make an air tight schedulw where every minute was accounted for?
2) Have you made contingency plans to address the triggers and idle times?
3) In times of temptation have you removed yourself from any possible venues where you know you may give in? If not, why?
4) Have you filled your mind and time in the pursuit of positive thinking, listened to helpful audiobooks, sermons, read inspirational books.
5) Do you understand that this is a process, that rebooting your brain requires consistent positive behavior and persistent avoidance of addictive behavior? It took me 2 years to feel slightly back to original factory settings, that is before porn
6) Have you been living the life of someone who is not addicted?
7) Why are you having problems keeping your word to yourself? Next time you say it is the last time, make sure it IS the LAST TIME. Every time you relapse it is detrimental to your psyche. It turns into an endless cycle that ends up hurting you in ways you will only notice when it is already too late.
The gist of my post is this, truthfully there is no reason read excuse to continue on this path. For me, it boiled down to that, if my behavior had no reason for being and was only hurting me, I had to stop it. There was no room for negotiation here.
You call it a fetish, I call it addictive behavior that has found a preference. So, as such, it can be rectified. All behavior can be rectified. All it needs is persistence and consistency.
Look for what caused the relapse and correct it. And promise yourself that since you deserve better, you will treat yourself better. And God cannot do his good work if you keep taking control every time. I had to simply let go and let God. I suggest you do the same.
Hope this helps,
Wolf (sober for almost 5 years) \"