I'm back.....
Hello to all my old friends here at DS (and maybe a few new ones) I have stayed away forever it seems, finally checking in here and there but not always finding alot of activity.
Recently I came on and stumbled across a post and some replies and it actually spoke to me. It reminded me that I am able to talk the talk but still struggle to walk the walk.I was reminded how easy it still is to encourage others while still struggling with negative words from hateful manipulative people so long ago. I'm also reminded that I am the one now who is sabotaging some of my own hopes for the future.
So here I am, back with love and hugs and hope for a kind shoulder, encouraging word and , YES, an occasional kick in the butt if needed to push me forward when I am back in a funk. HAHA
Thank you, Kim
Replies
Welcome back kim. Hi how you been? Hugs
Nice to see you, Kim!
Hello, friend! I always enjoyed the things you write/wrote. I think we all struggle with walking the walk. We are human, we slide downwards. I had an issue with a friend last week and she felt I was arguing, which I guess I was. If I said what her point was, you'd say I was correct. Now I look back and I should have shut up earlier or presented my point with an I feel message. She wasn't going to listen anyway, I realized. I ended up giving a proper apology "I apologize for" and then struggled to say what I did wrong except got strident. The argument was over something like the sky is blue, no it is black. Just weird.
Nice to hear from you! I’ll kick your butt, just saw when lol:)
LOL
Kim! Hello.
Hello to you all. I am so glad you all are still here. Hugs.
so what has life thrown in your lap kim? how is things going in other words....
Things are ok. I'm still at the same apt. (rent is too high, but I have a bit left from house sale to help) It is hard to find cheaper options. I need a first floor and am spoiled because my current place has alot of space and storage. I tried to check into income based apartments but there is at least a year's worth waiting list. I'm still working but just part time. I officially start Medicare Sept 1. I'm not yet old enough but because I have been on disability for 2 years it will kick in.
A friend of my late husband's has been texting and trying to get together but I keep putting it off. He is nice enough and it would probably be good for us to have a friend to spend some time with, but in the back of my mind, I remember so many similarities between him and Dave. I often wish I were not alone, but the thought of getting back in the same boat (with someone who does not really communicate, has different interests than I do and can be dependent and easily get used to being cared for) scares me the other way.
In reality, I know that if and when I do get back out there, I need to remember that I do not want to fall into the same trap as before. Fact is I don't trust myself enough to stand firm and not just "settle" again for someone unhealthy because I feel that's all I deserve. Look at me, still babbling after all this time. Some things never change. Bet you're sorry you asked. LOL
What's new with you?
Well they switched off my ssdi and put me on full retirement since now over 66.5 years old.
I gotta work part time or never have money after expenses. I do have two good jobs. One independent contractor driving tour shuttle van, other four hours weekly at auto auction on sale day.
I had a grant this year that put new roof on house, tuck pointed the chimney, gave me new Trane HVAC system and replaced some concrete on side of house also new basement door all $21,600 free never need to repay it. That rocked then I used some of my reverse mortgage to get house painted bright green with white awnings with two green stripes at bottom.
So now I love my house so much.
I am close to broke on reverse mortgage amount of my
Line of credit though. But that money is just to sit there without costing interest up to ten years. So its my cushion
Bill I'm glad things went so well with the house. I am on ssda and hear what you are saying to have to still work to have a little left after expenses. It sucks, but i guess it's good it keeps us moving and amongst people. You always seem to be up to something. lol
I would like to be up to no good with you too! Just kidding
heehee