If wishes were horses.......

If wishes were horses......beggars would ride.  That's why some wishes are worthless.  How many beggars get the chance to ride?  Many of us have wishes.....many of which.....would never come close to happening.  My wish is that we could get some good counseling for our family.  Unfortunately, the counselor at my son's treatment center is horrible.  I know T nor my husband would agree to go to one outside of drug treatment.  T complains on a regular basis that he hates the amount of time treatment takes up.  So he can find some time to get into trouble?  What does he need all this free time for anyway?  He isn't involved in any school or outside of school activities so why is it so important?  It isn't like he doesn't have any free time.   Okay.......it was my turn to enable today.  My husband bought T two high energy drinks for today at school.  T chooses to drink one last night and then goes out for a run.....two no-no's before bed.  So.....guess who probably didn't get a good nights sleep?  And guess who only had one energy drink to take to school today?  And guess who called me at 10AM (like clockwork at the same time everyday) this time, instead of asking to come home, asking me to bring him an energy drink?  Today is the last day I'm going to do that.  I will tell him today that if he chooses to drink one and to do strenuous workouts before bedtime, than he can expect me not to bring him anything.  Husband is too far away to bring things to him, otherwise he would....everyday.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Have you and your H tried counseling for just the two of you along with the family couseling? I am a firm believer in the two of you need to be on the same page. It\'s not helping your son any that Dad just gives in. And then making you look like the bad guy. It\'s so hard to work in harmony! Believe me, we have alot of that here too.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I know the issues are strong and probably seemingly so overwhelming. BUT may I suggest that you find yourself a personal counselor one you can relate too, who will help you with all your issues--let the son and the husband do there thing--insstead of focusing on the whole picture start with you. I have found that when I work on me, the other stuff around me starts to come into place or such as boundaries and limitations are set, I learn to be strong and rely on things my personal counselor and I work on. I would too agree that your husband out not to buy harmful things for your son and I\'d just merely state to your son, No I will not buy you energy drinks. It\'s not healthy or in my budget. You know I am here for you ---please take care of you and keep being strong.....pick a flower, plant a plant, go to a coffee shop and sit and drink your fav cup of joe, go find somewhere special that you can go to and breathe! Allow yourself some peace of mind--btw I\'m reading TWEAKED. Kinda scary but eyeopening. I am trying to read Beautiful boy too but it\'s hard to read two at a time. I recommend these two books as well as COMEBACK (MOTHER / DAUGHTER versions of the daughters addiction). I can\'t seem to finish taht bok probably cause I related to it so much due to Kelli and my relationship and her addictions.
Peace and blessings-
Cristine
deleted_user
deleted_user

Is the workout new -- is he trying to beat the drug test by reducing body fat (or so the rumor goes)? I agree with the suggestion for personal counseling -- go for yourself!!! You need to have a \"live\" person in your corner - supporting your efforts not to enable T. Take Care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!