I was doing good.

Crashed hard. The thought occurred to me that no matter how much I heal, my best friend, who I love deeply, will go through the rest of her life feeling and thinking I abandoned her, that I gave up on her. When the only reason I don't talk to her is because she told me not to. I'm respecting it - but not because I don't want her in my life. I miht bump into her tonight at the theatre as I pick up my daugther, and she's opening her show at my theatre this weekend. With several other friends in it. I can heal, I can get new friends, I can leave my wife or stay. Doesn't matter. She's going to feel the pain of something I have not done. Because she's surrounded by liars and enablers. And that hurts.