I thought. I really really did
Wow. I figured it out yesterday. It came to me like a bolt of lightening! The reason Kevin didn't call me was because 1. he is working and saving every penny to pay me and my dad back before he make contact (showing me that I really should "have a little faith" in him) and 2. that he was going to convey this to me via email! (you see, I can only access my work email on a computer and I don't have internet at home any more because of the huge bill he left me with). I immediately calmed down. I was going over and over in my head how I would respond. I mean, did I really even want to resume a relationship with this man that had hurt me so deeply?
Ha. What a fucking joke. No email. Not on my work email or on my personal. He's gone. He just up and left after six years together! I still cannot wrap my mind around this. How does anyone do that? Not even a card or a voice mail to say good bye or I'm sorry I hurt you and your family? How could I have been so wrong about someone?
My gut told me lots about Kevin. That he was not good with money. That he was not too concerned about paying his taxes or child support. But my gut NEVER told me that he didn't love me. Ever. That was the one thing that I was certain of. So, how does someone hurt someone so deeply and not express regret? This may be something I never get over.
San
Ha. What a fucking joke. No email. Not on my work email or on my personal. He's gone. He just up and left after six years together! I still cannot wrap my mind around this. How does anyone do that? Not even a card or a voice mail to say good bye or I'm sorry I hurt you and your family? How could I have been so wrong about someone?
My gut told me lots about Kevin. That he was not good with money. That he was not too concerned about paying his taxes or child support. But my gut NEVER told me that he didn't love me. Ever. That was the one thing that I was certain of. So, how does someone hurt someone so deeply and not express regret? This may be something I never get over.
San
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HI and (HUG))) . me too. i could not believe that mine just up and left with another. and inflict such pain. thing is......he has no idea of the pain he inflicted he is so selfish. and it sounds like yours is too. lawyer told me a goodie. I was rehashing some stuff and \'how come\' this and that...........
he said......do not try and make sense out of nonsense. and that is what i was doing.
and i am trying to quit doing.
you will always bear a scar but get over it........ you will. we all will.
Some people have very shallow emotions and very little empathy for others. I know that doesn\'t make it any easier. It didn\'t when Diana dumped me in very cruel fashion and on a turn of a dime.
I beat my head against a wall trying to make sense of it, but there was no sense I could find. I guess I eventually exhausted that approach and just accepted she is who she is.
To this day I can\'t comprehend her total lack of compassion. I\'ve come to realize that\'s an indication of how profoundly different we are and I do find comfort in what that says about me.
Be gentle with yourself. Go ahead and give a good rant every now and then but try not to blame yourself.
(((((Hugs)))))